When you realize that your existence is pointless

Why should there be a point or meaning to life? I can't even imagine what that point would be or who demands it. It doesn't matter how successful someone is. One day they'll die, and in a few decades, nobody will remember them anymore.

Life is a sandbox game. You spawn in, and the timer starts ticking. You can spend that time doing whatever you want. If you want to spend it in your mom's basement filled with self-pity, then that's what your life will be. It's your game; you're free to play it however you want. It's no different from Minecraft, really. If you're not motivated to start punching trees and build something great because "there's no point," then have at it. Meanwhile I'll be building this massive castle over here, which I'll never finish, but that's okay because it's all about the journey, not the destination. Life is now.

Seek therapy.

Nothing will help you because you don't want to be helped. So you just want to throw a pity party then.

Find a way to make the world you leave better than the one you entered. That's it. It can be something small or it can be something big. If you've already made it a little better, try to make it a lot better.

Therapy and medication can help a lot, too, but if you're determined to go it alone, that's my advice.

I’ve been in a similar position and I’m in my early 40s now. The best advice I can give is live out of spite. The reality is that your job, sexual endeavors, and achievements are ultimately meaningless. So much of it is just material things we can’t take with us. So much of this is requires gradual, iterative change.

• Working out makes you feel mentally better
• Which can lead to being noticed more
• Which can lead to increased confidence

The cycle continues. All of it starts with you though. The earth is a beautiful place even if humans are endlessly petty, materialistic, and self-centered. Even if you spent your day walking around your city, that’s a step in the right direction.

I know you didn’t ask for advice and I understand. That’s why I’m trying to put thoughts here that are not comprised of the same old 2-dimensional feedback you might receive off the cuff in your lifetime. Life is hard. It just is. I was laid off for 3 months and that was miserable. I lived with my family into my early 30s because I was a struggling graphic artist in a shitty town where pay was scarce.

But the things that pulled me out were:

• Spending my nights teaching myself how to code (can be done on even the cheapest of laptops)
• Forcing myself to not give a shit about what others were doing
• Forcing myself to get outdoors and remember that the world is vast and we’re all derived from space dust

Life can suck for a long time, so you have to find the bright spots. Even if it’s something like “I saw a cool bird today.” You need those little jump off points to spark interest.

I still struggle constantly, but I always try to remind myself that life isn’t a race and at the end of the day, so much of the shit we’re expected to care about is just meaningless. That’s not a bad thing. It can be freeing. Breaking the cycle of depression is tough and can become an endless circle. The only one that can break it is you and you alone. When it comes to your own life, you are the one part that truly matters. The rest follows with time.

Non-casualness and lack of points of discussion aside, I wish I could help with everything. And maybe I can. But not in a casual setting. How many places have you lived? Sometimes this is a factor.

I cannot stress this enough though, the free passes that seem to be taken for granted are more like liberties exploited. Take it from someone who has made better friends with the people of the next generation than their parents who have spilled how it really is.

Your importance is determined by your choices. Making choices with consequences gives your life meaning.

Hey mate kind of seems like you need a friend to talk to an just let it go. Please let me talk to you so we can get a conversation going . Because by your post you have not had anyone offer you that but I am here and all is ok in my book. Not calling you stupid but don't do anything you are going to regret. Much love mate and I hope this message finds you in Ernest.

Just random chance so stop thinking about the why.

I don't think there's an answer. We show up, we make the world a little better or worse for a short time, and then we're gone. In 120 years it will be all new people. I don't know what my job here is - feed some cats, 'save' a couple of dogs, help a few kids? Some people are driven to achieve. I'm not. I work for money and because it's expected. There's nothing I do that someone else couldn't step in and do as well or better. Some days are more fun than others but i rarely feel any sense of accomplishment. I do make a point to tell my family that i love them every day. It's something i wish i had started before my mom passed.

After a bad argument many years ago my husband said, "i don't know why i get so angry. I'm done making the people i love cry." From that day he changed his outlook. So, i guess my best advice is to do what you want, help when you can, and try not to hurt the people you love.

Weird ending, but have you tried gardening? I've met several people recently who really, honestly enjoy growing things - tomatoes, peppers, whatever.