Granted, cats now weigh thousands of pounds.
Poor cat lady’s house is now full of giant leopards. RIP
Cat burgers
I'm sure that if John Spartan thought rat burger tasted good, that cat burger would be fine too.
Granted, however cow pie size remains unchanged.
Granted. Intense selective breeding creates a dwarf cow to sell as designer pets. The process is excessively cruel and incestuous, and the dwarf cows are in constant pain, as well as stupid and easily angered. Animal rights groups see the creation of dwarf cows as more inhumane than beef production.
So the same as a bunch of dog breeds?
Yes, that's exactly what I was getting at. Thank you for stating it in plain text.
Granted, but they still weigh the same
Granted. They are immediately more endearing than any pet anyone has ever had... But by 3 years of age they are more delicious than any food anyone has ever eaten.
Granted, but they still have horns and can't be house broken.
Granted.
Mini-Cows will never become house trained so you become accostomed to a warm-squishy cow patty gushing between your toes when you walk to the bathroom late at night.
I have experience with cows and I can't think of a pet I would like less that wasn't actively dangerous.
I just think about the wet sloppy shits all over the house.
Granted. A startup called InGen starts producing them and as an early adopter, you're invited to their soon to be open island resort.
Granted. Now noone can get a decent burger or steak cus there's not enough beef.
wow I am late to the party
Granted, now cows, along with every other animal on earth, will become the size of cats
Good luck keeping something the same size of you as a pet and surviving all the insects that are now huge
Then buy some cows, breed them, and selectively breed them until they're really small. But don't forget about secondary characteristics like aggressiveness, etc. Don't breed them to be a smash-faced pug with breathing problems.
Op accidentally starts a cattle ranch in process of acquiring house pet. Not enough generations of cows pass, and they die as a farmer.
Better hurry, though, since culture might change and suddenly domesticated animals like cows are recognized as people with rights and 20th century burger-eating culture becomes taboo.
can you housebreak a cow?
Milking them would be quite difficult. And the methane burps would be a fire hazard in the house.
