Memes @lemmy.ml

1y ago

Shots fired.

118 comments

Ignoring the obvious joke, she doesn't display any of Jesus's qualities. Is she gentle, caring, and compassionate? Does she humbly serve the poor and the disadvantaged? Does she forgive her enemies and bless those who oppose her? Does she sacrifice for the benefit of others!?
I'm a Christian and while I don't know for certain, I believe God knows the heart. But I don't expect to see her in Heaven...
- she doesn't display any of Jesus's qualities
  Disagree.
  She has long hair. Ok, not specified in the bible, but it's canon at this point.
  Also the episode of Jesus whoring at the theatre... Wait what is this bible?
  
  For a moment I really thought there was something in the bible that could be seen as Jesus "whoring at the theater"
  
  Jesus had hair like lamb's wool, canonically.
  
  She is also white, like Jesus.
  
  i've heard about this supply-side jesus doing miracles. she pretty much raised some dead tent there.
- Jesus would've given handies in the cinema if he was asked.
  
  Through the holes?
  
  *�
- MAGA Christian, which is the majority of "Christians".
  
  I can't tell which part you're replying to. Are you saying I'm MAGA!? I agree that unfortunately most "Christians" are, but I dare you to check my history...
- Seems like "Christianity" and "following Jesus' teachings, words, and example" are completely at odds. I appreciate what you are saying. Why don't we hear Jesus Followers calling out "Christians" more vocally and often? I'd expect more of a break in the church at this point, but it seems like a fairly united front to me even now.
  
  I have to conclude that the vast majority of Christians are fine with people being shitty as long as they identify as Christian.
  
  There are Unitarian churches and similar places of worship that don't allow this bigotry.
  
  Absolutely, they're at-odds! Church attendance is down and people like me will now walk out if the pastor/leadership starts talking about following Trump. As for why that is, I don't know. I think people have been following money and power rather than Jesus for a while now...
- Give atheism a try, you won't regret it.

Oh common guys, that doesn't have to be about oral sex and you know it.
It could just as well be about doggy style.
- But she sucks so hard
  
  Golf ball through a garden hose hard? If not it's still not worth it
- Wow. Way to circumvent my comment with a clever zip in the other direction. I love it.
  
  Sigh... unzips.

She’s apparently equally strong while seated in a crowded movie theater.
- This is the part that really got me. We’re all human and have our urges, no shame there. The average unknown Joe Schmoe knows to contain themselves in public - let alone a public figure with all eyes on them. What was the thought process?
  
  It’s Bobo, friend, there is no “thought” process
  
  The theater is dark, and she probably didn't realize it had night vision cameras for security. Most people will also not have phones at hand, as its a rude act in a theater.
  She really thought she could be an asshole because social pressure and darkness made it hard to prove she was an asshole after the fact. Its why she came out lying hard about vaping around pregnant women and somehow didn't mention have her chest gropped and grabbing for dick around a bunch of people/kids.

She's certainly good on her knees, but Jesus' got nothing to do with it...
- Jesus take the shaft
  
  Catholic priests: That's what I keep telling the alter boy!
  
  https://youtu.be/rL7dJwo6vUk

Shit like this makes me think she knows exactly what she's doing, and she's trying to position herself as the Sexy Nun archetype. She tries to be good but can't help that the world sexualizes her against her will (wink). She would be ever so grateful to any strong, Christian men who might come to her aid and defend her honor from the lustful satanists.
- This lady dumb as a box of hair, bless her soul...
  
  Heard this on a podcast today:
  10gal hat for a ½oz brain.
- She probably thinks, in all honesty, that the average person is too stupid to understand the innuendo, and that only the clever ones will get it, like it's some exclusive inside joke.
  
  Only 150+ IQ people can solve this puzzle.
- It's all branding for all of them.
- Shit like this makes me think people don't recognize fake tweets anymore.
  
  100% real tweet from her.
  
  You're correct, it's really hard to tell nowadays, and you proved your own point. This is a real tweet, but I don't blame you for thinking it's satire.

So she gives good head. Woopty do.
- You're gonna have to stand on some books cuz knees too strong.

I think they tossed her from the theater before she was "driven" to her knees.

And she's got that poofy hair so you can set your beer on her head...

I wouldn't even expect her to be good at that. She has the same personality as those who are bad at it- arrogant, condescending, etc. The traits that make her a bad person also tend to make bad lovers.
- Yeah, she'd have to kinda turn around and root down under the sheet until she could find the hole that had been cut out, and all of this without her glasses no doubt. Doesn't make for memorable oral.

She's cumpletely right.
- i won't believe it until she shows me

As an atheist who was raised Christian I'm torn.
On one hand, God dies not take kindly to charlatans and blowhards. On the other hand, I am of the belief that this life is all there is and shitty people like her are statistically unlikely to get some cosmic comeuppance after death
- Right, that's the thing they don't get. Might surprise them to learn, I almost wish their beliefs were true, so that they might taste that eternal fire they wish on others for their own shitty actions and thoughts
  
  As an atheist, I wish we could have a rapture so the rest of us could get on with our lives
- blowhards
  indeed. heh.
- Sam here all around, it's unfortunate that she won't get punished for being a huge POS. She's just going to live life convinced she's some oppressed and just individual.
- God dies not take kindly to charlatans and blowhards
  I thought God was perfect and loved all.his children equally.
  
  Going by what happens in this life, God seems to reward shitty people.
  
  Idk man the Bible has God hating a lot of people. Sometimes individuals, sometimes groups.

Are we not doing phrasing anymore?! - Archer

She knew

Bobo, what the fuck are you talking about?
- What are you talking about?
  We've seen the video. You read the tweet.
  This woman has obviously sucked a whole bag of dicks.
  
  In a row?
  
  Why does she have a bag of Richards, and why is she just sucking on people named Richard? Is this some Republican kink?

Whose shots have been fired exactly?
- Cum shots.
  
  That's not an answer to my question, captain obvious, Sir.

Sociopath

A lot of the Christians who ban extramarital sex also define sex very narrowly; as such, they say “if you see a nice Christian girl on her knees, she ain’t praying”.
- Catholic Girls
  At the CYO
  Catholic Girls
  Do you know how they go?
  Catholic Girls
  There can be no replacement
  How do they go, after the show?
  Aaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllll the waaaaaaaaay.
  That's the way they go.

The religious right is officially a post-religion movement.

I’m gonna need video proof of that one.

This bird has got to go.
- Hey hey, ho ho

That is usually how the pedo priests do it, so yeah.

Play to your strengths, Lauren. Maybe it's time to drop the sad quasipolitical angle and just go pro.

Unless she's gonna give me a Boeberts during the next MCU movie I don't wanna hear shit from her other than "dinners ready".

🤢

Bow chicka bow wow

Persecution complex/fetish
- "Is it inappropriate to grope each other in a theater? No, it's the whiners that are wrong." /s

i keep seeing this sort of moral outrage, that's she's some horrible criminal doing lewd acts in public.....are people doing satire? i genuinely cannot tell, i cannot imagine why anyone would care about adults doing mild foreplay in the dark at a theater to the point where they should be criminally charged and we have a whole other big national trial that goes nowhere
i know she sucks and she's a bad person but that doesn't mean i'm rooting for prosecution for getting to 2nd base and vaping
- It's not the act, it's the hypocrisy of the act

Who the fuck are these people and why is the internet making a big deal of some boob grabbing?
- Shes a politician whos entire career is claiming that transgender people are completely unhinged immoral deviant pedophiles. She went into a family friendly theatre on a date with some guy, the theatre had plenty of children present, and then they fondled each other. While vaping and loudly yelling.
  She's barely coherent on the best of days. Her latest... escapades... just perfectly show how she herself is entirely devoid of decency and not the pillar of modest Christian femininity she tries to claim she is.
  
  A hypocritical Christian gasp!! /s
  
  Hmm, this seems the best answer so far. So basically some random american politician doing stuff normal people usually do, but in this case she fucked up because her career in politics is about spreading hate for trans people. Seems totally normal american behavior. I was confused because all the memes or references to this seems to be about the man, and not having any bit of context about the internals of another country makes it hard to follow up on internet dramas.
- What boob grabbing? I see none here
  
  Have you not seen the security footage of this lying anti-american tramp in the theatre getting felt up and grabbing dick around children?

118 comments