Centipedes Don't Fuck

Ok now I'm curious about what the fuck the two centipedes I found in my basement that I thought were fucking were actually doing. They sure looked like they were fucking.

They were wrestling. Go back to bed.
- wrestling 😏
Maybe they were those queer centipedes that fuck in person. Degenerates
- They do it just for fun! Gross.
Don't humanize centipedes! That leads to strange and disturbing things...
- too late
  
  Too late
  
  Too Late
  
  TOO LATE
  
  There are way, way more "centipede monster girl" image results... DuckDuckGo/Google
  
  Caterpillar girls are fine though.
- Someone has already centipedized humans. This is the next step.
- Don’t humanize centipedes
  
  I'M DOING MY PART!
- Just gonna take a quick stroll over to rule34.xxx and see what there is to see...
  
  Edit: Jesus fuck 638 results. We just needed ONE to confirm the rule, but 638?!
- And three movies that never should have been made.
- Gonna put put my dick in a centipede
When two centipedes ~~love each other~~ are both really hungry...
A disappointingly large proportion of the general population appears to be unable to tell the difference between centipedes and millipedes. Is it possible that the "centipedes" you saw were actually millipedes? If so, they may have been "fucking", or at least the millipede equivalent of it.

Additionally, it appears that this "fact" is actually wrong (big surprise, huh?). Many species of centipede do have courtship strategies that involve males and females meeting up. The sexes may even employ various forms of physical touch as part of the process. So, it's certainly possible that the critters you saw where centipedes courting each other.
- https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Centipede#/media/File%3AMillipede_centipede_side-by-side.png
  
  Assuming this is actually representative of the difference, it was definitely a pair of centipedes.
  
  I'm not surprised in the least that at a minimum it's more complicated than the meme suggests, and now I've learned far more about centipedes than I ever wanted to. Thanks!
- millepedes are gross. centipedes are scary
Centipedes see other Centipedes as food, which is why they reproduce this way.

Source: made it up, but it seems logical. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
They could have been fighting. Maybe there was a lack of available food or fluid.
maybe they're just the cuddly-type except for the distancing-fucking

EDIT: I just realized this is Zizeks perfect romance as described by him

The last time I left sperm packets on the ground I was branded a "pervert" and a "freak" and told to leave the restaurant immediately before they called the police.

Have you tried growing 98 more legs first?
- Or at least 28 more
- 97
- I think they always have an odd number of pairs, so 96 or 100.
You need to dress it up as geocaching.

Sooo are centipedes like fruit flies and not engage in any real form of sexual selection, or is the female going around judging the fuck out of every jizz pile she encounters?

"Mmm-mm, look at that poor viscosity, obviously from a low-quality male. This one on the other hand: deep color, firm texture, nice and sticky... clearly produced by a male with the superior genes I want to pass along to my offspring."

I'm upset no ones chimed in with a really technical breakdown and linked some studies
- I am tempted to research it but I don't want to be on another list
Centipedes are all perfect beings and need no selection
Or just slip in it like a banana peel and boom pregnant

The DoorDash approach to sexual reproduction. Fantastic.

Oh boy, the jar arrived!
- And a complementary turkey baster, too!

have you seen a centipede? completely unfuckable

...unless you are a leg man...
- Now im imagining a centipede sticking out fifty pantyhosed legs from around the corner while catcalling its mark.
Woah there buddy, please don't fetish shame.

Taking “hit it and quit it” to the next level.

Skeet and yeet.

So THAT'S how Vance & his wife have kids: he leaves her some fresh sperm in the couch

damn, the lore thickens
I was ready for lizard people but bug people is where I draw the line.

.

Most cephalopods die after mating. Their sex hormones make them go crazy and they stop looking for food except to eat themselves occasionally. Once the sex hormone glad starts pumping them out, it doesn't stop until they die a horrible death. Live fast and die young.
- I was very excited about humanity killing itself off and letting the superior line of sapience take over until I learned this fact. It's going to be a bit before the octopi are ready to create a civilization.
- I've met people like this
- You mean you have to choose between a life without sex and a gruesome death? ... Tough call.