They'll generally choose convenience over a better path. This ranges from the people who just leave grocery carts in the parking lot, to people who stay on the platform formerly known as Twitter as opposed to being a part of supporting more ethical alternatives, to people who defend the data harvesting practices of big tech companies, just to name a few examples.
Twitter should be one of the easiest social media platforms to leave. Mastodon seems every bit as good as Twitter with the lack of users being it's only real flaw.
The microblog style seems to work the best with federation as well since you're following people.
I tried mastodon and it wasn't an easy switch from twitter for me.
I mostly followed artists on twitter, none of which had moved to mastodon, and likely most of them never will.
It was also pretty impossible to just happen upon cool people I'd wanna follow randomly because the default feeds are just everything.
Say what you will about algorithmic social media feeds but they're a lot better than just showing you everything at once.
The reason a lot of people don't leave the big platforms is that everyone else is there, especially if it's your way of staying in contact with friends.
I found it easy to ditch all "traditional" social media, expect for Discord (because all my friends use it), Yes we could all very easily switch to Matrix or some other open alternative, But 95% of people ain't gonna do that anytime soon.
The inability to distinguish between creation and creator. It is completely fine to like Harry Potter and still think that J.K.Rowling is nuts. You can dislike Dolly Parton's songs and still appreciate her for the awesome human being she is.
The vast majority of people obviously can't do that for some reason. It's either "both creation and creator are shit" or "both are awesome" and nothing inbetween, to the point that some folks automatically assume you're a climate change denier because you listen to Meatloaf, or do a 180° turn about liking/disliking movies, arts, novels etc. depending on what their authors did IRL. And don't get me started on Nintendo fanboys .... if you tell them you love the Zelda franchise but dislike Nintendo as a company, they'll rip you apart because you're obviously not allowed to have anything else but a single-track blanket opinion about literally everything they ever did.
If you like someone, you are not obligated to support each and every one of their actions, decisions or world views, and if you dislike someone you can (and should IMHO) still appreciate it if they do something good.
Someone else more less touched on this but I think you're missing the point.
I don't know a single person who thinks you can't like someone's art because you dislike the artist. Using your example, I have plenty of friends who grew up with Harry Potter and still absolutely love the series in many ways. However they also think JK Rowling is a piece of shit.
The problem lies in giving a platform to people who, at the very least outspokenly, espouse harmful views, and/or engage in harmful activities. So generally speaking, they tend to take some amount of issue (how much varies person to person) with people continuing to support works from them without some demonstration of change or betterment. In turn, most of us stop consuming their content wholesale, as we don't want to support their actions or views by contributing to their platform and would prefer others do the same.
People like what you're talking about exist, sure. I also think that demographic is nearly exclusively terminally online people, who tend to be quite a bit louder than your average person. Which in turn can skew how commonly held of an opinion something can seem to be.
I don’t know a single person who thinks you can’t like someone’s art because you dislike the artist
I know plenty of people like this.
terminally online
Mind if I steal that description? It's perfect ♥
As for your comment; I am completely fine with people deciding for themselves that they no longer wish to engage with some creation because its creator sucks - that's a personal choice and I can respect that decision easily.
What I don't get are people who try to force that decision onto others, like going "...but the author is shit, so you HAVE to now hate literally everything they ever did, and if you don't then you're just as bad as them". No, I don't have to do anything of the sort - and that does not mean that I support the world views of the author. It only means that the world view of the creator hasn't ruined the creation for me.
I don't think you should be upset with someone for liking an artist's work despite their personal life but I've definitely stopped listening to artists for theirs. I'll be half way through the opening verse and remember "oh yeah, this dude's a rapist" and don't want to continue.
On the flip side, I know Jackie Chan has had his fair share of controversy....but I still love his films and on-screen persona.
but I’ve definitely stopped listening to artists for theirs.
That's a personal choice, and I'm completely fine with that. If you can't help but dislike a work of art because it always reminds you of the bad thing its creator did/said, there is no shame in no longer engaging with said art as it won't bring you happiness anymore.
What I don't get are people who go "waaah noo, how DARE you like that song! The singer is an asshole, you have to hate their music now!" ... no, I don't have to. And that does not automatically mean I am okay with what the singer did - it just means that their actions haven't ruined the song for me.
No offense, but just no. If you don't like the art, but the artist that's fine, absolutely no problem here, but supporting a person like J. K. Rowling financially by consuming their creation is actually a problem and should be opposed.
This view is enabling horrible people and not okay.
supporting a person like J. K. Rowling financially
If I already own the books, I'm not going to toss them away just because the author is an ass. It doesn't hurt her anyway. And you can buy books, movies etc. secondhand, as secondhand stores, private sellers and the like don't have to pay royalties to the author. There are plenty of ways to consume their creations without supporting the creator.
If you pirate their art, I suppose you have a point.
But if you're financially supporting folks who are actively opposed to your existence or the existence of people you care about, that's pretty foolish.
Harry Potter is the only reason folks care about J.K. Rowling. However, her words outside of her books have influenced politics and have hurt marginalized folks.
Because she's making money, she doesn't care.
Until JK doesn't make a dime from Harry Potter, your fandom of the IP will financially support her hateful views.
Pretty sure she'd still have those views, even if she was poor. I understand and respect people who decide to boycott certain creators for their political views and statements--I stopped buying Orson Scott Card's books after finding out things he'd said about homosexuality among other things--but I don't think people who oppose a creator's views, but still choose to pay for their work should be shamed for it. When you pay for a product, you're paying for that product and are thus supporting only what went into that product. I think there's more of an issue of hypocrisy in people who have problems with Apple's labor practices in China or their anti-consumer practices, but still buy their products, as those issues are directly linked to said products and therefore their money is inherently rewarding them (but, full disclosure: I'm one of those people, as I own an iPhone). If the Harry Potter books had some anti-trans message in them, that'd be one thing, but I don't think that's the case, is it (I honestly don't know, as I haven't read them)? I think people can still enjoy and financially support the HP IP without tacitly supporting JK Rowling's politics, just as Tesla owners can enjoy their cars without supporting Elon's whacky political views.
Ok? So what If you already bought and read the books, does that mean you'll have to throw them away, burn them, and you're never ever allowed to enjoy the fictional story of Harry Potter ever again because the author is an ass....? Or that by liking the fictional story you automatically support her world view as well, finances aside?
It's the exact thing I described. Yes J.K. Rowling is nuts but that does not mean that you have to hate the Harry Potter books / movies. You can hate the author for what she did and said independendly from the stories she wrote.
We're all so bad at communicating and it is the bottleneck in most relationships, workplaces, and in politics.
We talk past each others when we argue. We're bad at definining the stuff we argue and talk about. We're bad at ignoring the pedantic stuff and focusing on the "spirit" of the argument.
At the workplace I feel the ability to share information to all the relevant parties without it being noisy has never been solved in big corporations. It is either a free-for-all situation where you're expected to read hundred of emails, answer anyone anytime, go in tons of meeting, OR to work in complete silos where you only talk to a supervisor once in a blue moon.
In friendships you have people who talk but don't listen and people who listen and don't talk. Oversharers, bullshiters, people who can't get to the point, people who gives 5 minutes of context and disordered information for every little things. Friends who mumble, or who don't finish half their sentences.
In relationships we let unresolved issues become taboos, and we let petty stuff buildup because we can't addresss it without anyone feeling attacked.
Communication is important, as you've already been told by a poster or an HR person, but I rarely see people actively try to better themselves in that area, nor the corporations I worked at. You won't have anything durable without it, or anything capable of scaling efficiently.
I am probably very bad at it too, for the simple reason that virtually all the people I know are ever good at best at a few aspects of it. I am self-conscious about communicating properly but I too probably suck at it and I have my blind spots just like everyone else. For this reason, this is the thing I hate about everyone, we can't communicate for shit and we don't even realize it most of the time.
What's most frustrating about it is that even when I try to help others see that this is the real cause of friction between us - that poor communication or misunderstanding is the real cause of our arguments, many if not most would still fight me that I'm wrong and they're right and it's like nobody wants to reach a solution, they'd rather forever spin in the accusations
When I ask them a simple question and they answer with at least ten-sentences-long answer.
Jes, I do it too.I totally get where you're coming from! It can be frustrating when you just want a quick answer to a straightforward question, and instead, you're bombarded with a seemingly endless stream of words. It's like trying to take a sip from a water fountain and getting hit by a firehose, right?
But here's the thing, sometimes those long answers are necessary. Think of it like this: Simple questions might have complex answers hiding beneath the surface. So, when someone provides a lengthy response, they might be trying to give you a complete picture.
Sure, not everyone's a fan of reading a novella in response to "What's the weather like today?" But consider that some people are genuinely passionate about sharing their knowledge or experiences. They might want to make sure you understand the topic thoroughly or provide you with additional context that could be helpful down the line.
It's like when your grandma starts telling you a story about her pet hamster from 30 years ago when all you asked was if she wanted a cup of tea. Annoying at times, sure, but she's just excited to share a piece of her life with you.
The key here is balance. If someone's giving a longer answer than necessary, it might be polite to gently remind them that you were just looking for a quick tidbit of information. But remember, on the other side, there's a real person trying to be helpful or connect with you in some way. So, maybe next time you see a long response to a simple question, take a deep breath, skim through it, and you might just find a hidden gem of knowledge or a new perspective you hadn't considered before!
But here's the thing, sometimes those long answers are necessary. Think of it like this: Simple questions might have complex answers hiding beneath the surface.
That's the biggest problem I had with Twitter since day one. It was designed to not allow for nuance or detailed explanations.
“Giving a simple answer” can get a person yelled at for “lying by omission.” Or yelled at for “why didn’t you tell me this other detail?!”
Some people are better/worse with this than others.
I remember when I was training for something in school, I dreaded asking my professor a question even though I really needed to. He would go into 10 minute long tirades and never really answer the question.
Every single time...
On that note, I hate question dodgers. Especially since I work online chatting with customers, and I'll ask them something direct, like "when were you meant to receive this check" and they fucking come back with "So my check is missing"
Like damn, fuckhead. I am already aware your check is missing. Definitely not what I asked. And I can't tell if they are just that brand of dumb or if they're being difficult on purpose.
I had a gf who would answer half my questions with something completely irrelevant. Or if I told her anything remotely like criticism, she'd respond by criticizing or attacking me about something completely irrelevant, and never address what I said, ever, no matter how fair or important it was. Drove me nuts.
If you want someone to give you a simple answer ask them a close ended question.
For example, "Should I do A or B?" If you ask for "this or that" it is clear to the listener that you considered your options already and have invested sufficient thought to your question. Therefore they can just offer you their opinion as it is asked.
If you ask "What should I do?" The listener has no idea where your head is at so it feels like their job to justify their answer.
Alternatively if you ask A or B and the correct answer is C then the listener may feel the need to correct your understanding because you asked for their assistance. The same teach a man to fish vs give a man a fish analogy applies here. Noone wants to repeatedly fish for the peraon too lazy to learn.
For example, “Should I do A or B?” If you ask for “this or that” it is clear to the listener that you considered your options already and have invested sufficient thought to your question. Therefore they can just offer you their opinion as it is asked.
Ask customer if it's this or that - they respond with just "yes"
You underestimate how stupid the general public truly is.
Who would ever do something like that?
Me? I totally don't! I'm a paragon of succinctness, here's why: [insert 40 sentences explanation filled with 20 examples]
When I ask a simple question and get a ten-paragraph answer that has nothing to do with the actual question.
How easily it is to normalize hate and violence to almost any human.
Because that's the default. We have to learn to be better.
I'd argue the opposite. Kids aren't born hating anyone different from them. They are taught "anyone with that skin color/gender/sexuality/religion/etc is inferior to you and you should hate them."
The big problem is that hatred can be passed down. My father's racist. Not in a "hang all black people" way, but more in a "I can't be racist because I have a black friend but black people should act more like white people" way. Growing up, I started taking on his beliefs (as young kids often do).
At one point, I made a very insensitive joke in class about a religion and the kid sitting behind me said that he was in that religion. Now, I don't know if he was or wasn't, but it was eye opening to me. I realized what I was doing and didn't like it. I took the time and effort to root out my prejudices.
It wasn't easy. Even now, over 30 years later, I'll occasionally realize that some action I'm taking is driven by prejudice. Still, I've rooted out many prejudices that otherwise would have made me into just as big of a bigot as my father. And my kids go even further than my at being accepting of others. One of many reasons I'm proud of them.
Hatred doesn't come naturally. It is taught. Luckily, it can be "unlearned" if the person is willing to do the work and acceptance can be taught/reinforced also.
Dualistic thinking. The idea that things must be either good or bad, true or false, normal or perverse.
False dichotomy is humanity's favorite logical fallacy.
It is the fuel of religion.
Noise.
This one really gets me. Makes me feel like a cranky old asshole, but I find myself regularly thinking (all directed at my neighbors):
“Do you really need to slam the front door on your way out every day?”
“Do you really need to slam the car door every time you get in and out?”
“Does your meaningless 3 hour phone conversation really need to be on speaker for the whole neighborhood to hear?”
“Are you an elephant? Or is there a reason you can’t walk across the apartment without banging each foot like you have a vendetta against the floor?”
I could go on and on.
Me, I'm hard of hearing and probably have undiagnosed ADHD. You may have heard of auditory stimming: basically, that the ability to make noise that one can hear helps regulate dopamine production. I need to hear the door close to feel like I closed it. Hearing my own footsteps allows me to take my concentration off walking without falling over. I sing more-or-less constantly.
I stopped living in apartments ASAP because I didn't want to inconvenience those around me, but I can't just "be quiet" unless I'm actively concentrating on it the whole time.
People who use speakerphone in public were raised wrong, though.
Mate, now I want you as my neighbor.
Can you be my neighbor? Let's buy a lot somewhere lmao
We would be like ninjas (almost)
I had a girlfriend who would slam the fuck out of the toilet lid every time she used it. Not like, extra force, as far as i could tell, just let it drop from vertical to close. Super loud. It was ruining the hinges... I asked her over and over to please stop doing that. No change... I was set to install cork bumpers and she insisted NO, can't do that. Okay... so stop slamming it? A year later, still every single time.
Especially when it's comes from their mouth from chewing food.
I hate that many people idolise other people.
It's possible to like some of the work of somebody without idolising them and blindly listening to or following absolutely everything they do.
Elon Musk is the best example: SpaceX has some really cool ideas (Falcon 9, Starship, Starlink) and Tesla made EVs palatable to car enthusiasts, which is an important step.
But on the whole he is an absolute piece of shit with a fragile ego.
That's a great example, I was prompted by the Fluke Skywalker stuff going on, But there are plenty of times when people who are famous for something are found to fall short. Then you get this outpouring of grief and disappointment, It happens enough that people should know better really.
That we all think we're far more in control of ourselves than we are. Yes, including me. A person isn't in charge of the self, even a majority. Not by a long shot. We're the smartest monkeys in the room, but we're still monkeys. None of us are fully rational robots, but a lot of us pretend we are.
I think irrationality is evidence of our control if anything. Animals are generally more rational than us (I say this as someone who hates people who worship rationality.)
I don't think animals are completely emotionless, but a lot more of what other animals do can be explained by survival instinct than humans.
We do not keep planets very well.
The fallacy of the middle ground. This is where most 'centrists' fall.
That's interesting, because I was going to say I hate how a lot of people are very susceptible to extremism and binary thinking.
Agreed, but some solutions have a fairly binary answer. Extremism is a huge problem, but that is part on centrists tolerating intolerance and not taking a stance. There is no middle ground for racist ideology. There is no room for it in society. The answer to "I believe the Jews should be exterminated" is simply opposing it, "Jewish people have a right to maintain and cultivate themselves and their culture. To put it simply, for someone who wishes complete death for the Jews, the answer is not the middle ground. You cannot compromise and say "how about we kill half a Jew only?". This example is stupid and has lots of flaws, but I just came off of night shift.
Mass hysteria/idiocy, like how easy it is for a crowd to drop logic and reason and be worked up into a frenzy because some populist/talking head/anonymous online account is telling them what to think or manipulating them with a bunch of half truths.
This is why we can't have nice things.
That in times of conflict, human nature, the default mindset of humans, is often used as a crutch like a medical condition would be, and that we simultaneously still consider ourselves persons as we define persons as members of the moral community, the same one we use human nature to excuse ourselves for violating.
Their snot
The inefficiency. Why the fuck are we walking so goddamn slow? Why can't you eat faster? Oh god, don't make me watch you not use keyboard shortcuts. Why is everyone living like they want to be here in this goddamned line more than anything else in life?
Why the fuck are we walking so goddamn slow?
I also walk fast all the time but I am trying to be a little slower so I don't get sweaty while going places. Maybe it's like that for other people as well. What I don't understand is why so many people seem to be completely oblivious to their surroundings and the way they block the path for other people.
Why can’t you eat faster?
Some people like to enjoy their food.
Oh god, don’t make me watch you not use keyboard shortcuts.
I can actually get behind this one.
Why is everyone living like they want to be here in this goddamned line more than anything else in life?
I'm unable to decypher what exactly you are complaining about here. What line are you talking about?
I get you.
The hypocrisy of caring and Hallmark holidays.
Some calendar days were created by companies out to make money, others by organizations trying desperately to raise awareness for their worthwhile cause.
The end result is often the same, jump on the bandwagon for one day to be seen as doing good or being good, then hop off and return to business as usual.
There's a calendar day coming up that every year makes my life worse. For one day a year, acquaintances ask me a question, don't care about or listen to my answer, and then go back to ignoring me for another year. Oh but hurrah for them, they did the thing they normally wouldn't because social media gives them warm fuzzies for announcing they did the thing. They don't even remember the questions or answers, for them, it was a thing to do, instead of being a better caring person for the other 364 days.
Saturday, September 16th is Batman Day. And everyone asks "wouldn't a billionaire help more by using his wealth than his fists?" right before they get the smack.
Apologies are always forced or insincere. Nobody finds themselves in the wrong on their own anymore.
Well there are those of us who just feel we've done the wrong thing all the time and practically apologise just for existing. Not that that's better.
100%
I immediately gain respect for people who matter-of-factly admit when they’re wrong and apologize for doing or saying something that warrants an apology. I think it’s a sign of an emotionally mature and self-confident person. You don’t lose anything by admitting an error or fault, it fact you gain perspective and knowledge that helps you develop as a person, while giving credit to the person who knew the right thing. Everybody wins.
Not always, but most from the majority of public figures tend to be.
Can't they just fucking read AND comprehend.
If people would not just read things but also use some brain power to comprehend the words they just read, then the world would be a few percentage points smarter overall.
Also while they are at it, observe the world you are living in. People ask stupid questions all the time because they don't open their eyes and take in the world for a few seconds. "where is the bathroom?" As they ignore the sign. "What time does the bus come?" As they ignore the printed schedule. "How do you open this hatch?" As the arrows point to the handle.
I've honestly been astounded at how much of the population appears to be functionally illiterate. You tell them how to spell a url and they're more likely to just hand you the phone because that's hard.
I sometimes wonder if that'll be what's left - illiterate masses cared for by a few not-quite-dumb bastards that can work a can opener or read the instructions on the pump.
That they're people....
Damn humans, they ruined humanity!
Culture is generally very low, look how people use their fucking smartphones.
I witnessed people watching tok tok shorts with their speakers blasting low quality audio on repeat in the following situations:
-
when hanging out with a group of friends
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in the bus/tram/commuter train
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THE FUCKING CINEMA
Why can't people just use headphones?
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At the end of the day, we're all just out for ourselves. There aren't any (or many) truly selfless acts.
Every favor comes with some sort of price. Which is why I never ask of anything from anyone and I hate when people ask anything of me.
We’re out for ourselves, yea. But we’re also out for each other, because we like or need each other. Thinking about things transactionally, that cynicism to avoid getting tricked or hurt… I don’t think that’s conducive to good relationships or a happy life.
Every favor comes with some sort of price.
This isn't a bad thing. Psychology has shown us that doing favors for someone makes us feel closer to them. Not the asker towards the doer, the other way around. And it's only natural for the doer to balance their own needs against what's being asked, and to expect some sort of reciprocity in the future. This is how trust and relationships are built, at least in primates.
Narcissism. I don’t give a fuck about your vacation. Or your dinner. Or that your kid won the spelling bee. No, I don’t want to see your facetube or insta or whatever the fuck. Go find your validation in something real.
