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chapotraphouse @hexbear.net

RNAi [he/him] @hexbear.net

3d ago

Melk

71 comments

"State Beverage" is midcentury marketing brain worms for large agribusinesses. It might be quaint but they sold a shit ton through idiotic reflexive reactionary nationalism.
- It's such a parasitic version of state flowers/trees. The blue columbine being our state flower means it's illegal to pick one. Our public lands can be unimaginably beautiful because the columbine fields are so thick that they perfume the air. Dairies poison my water as much as their product poisons me.
- Yeah I saw tomato juice for Ohio and just immediately assumed it was a lobbying campaign from the 60s, they only produce about 1% of California's yield though.
  
  My quick google searches say that Ohio made it tomato juice to coincide with a regional state fair that centered around tomatoes. Apparently Ohio was the largest producer of tomatoes in the US in 1965.

- EDIT: I've seen this before, but can someone remind me what this is from?
  I promise this is curiousity posting not horny posting.
  
  https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/forced-to-drink-milk

milk is the most fascist beverage
- I agree instinctively, is there a reason why this is the case?
  
  Treatment of cattle is not that different to how fascists view and treat humans.
  
  One of the few drinks directly extracted from the body of an exploited being.
  
  possibly because it's inextricably linked with animal agriculture, specifically one of an industrial scale
  
  https://faunalytics.org/the-unbearable-whiteness-of-milk-food-oppression-and-the-usda-2/
- Insert Homelander clip
- I was doing a bit at work recently where it's the opening scene of Inglorious Basterds but Hanz Landa has never heard of milk before or seen a cow. Once he finds out what they've been doing to cows he figures there is no way those freaks would be harboring jews
- Wisconsinites in shambles rn

Bruh
- Tomato juice is the most punk drink, Ohio doesn't deserve it.
  Nebraska absolutely deserves theirs however
  
  Let me have just one win for being born in this shithole state.
  
  Tomato juice isn't bottom shelf booze, and is therefore disqualified for most punk rock drink
  
  tomato juice is amazing and you can put black pepper or whatever in it and then it's spicy tomato juice and it's amazing.
- I love a good michelada, but I never had one when I lived in Ohio....
  
  Have had some good ones in the state but it's not a regular thing there lol

This is probably part of post-war US dairy industry lobbying.
- All the ones that are milk related are from the 80s, it's probably some Regan bullshit.

21 of them accepted milk lobby money, you mean lmao

14 of them between the years 1981-1987
As American milk consumption continued to dip throughout the 1980s, the billion-dollar dairy industry was at risk of collapsing. Desperate, the United States government hired top-tier marketing agencies and experts to run campaigns to increase milk demand. This birthed the famous Got Milk? advertisements
- It also led to stuffed crust pizza and cheese caves to inflate demand for dairy lmao. I bet the use of powdered milk in most foods is actually redundant and just a result of that lobbying

My state doesn't have an official beverage, probably because it would be ranch dressing.
- Hey ranch is the state beverage of alaska because we invented it!
  
  By a Nebraskan man. Sorry, but the Midwest is claiming this one, no one loves ranch like us.

heh. State beverage. So dumb. I wonder what my dumb state made theirs.
We don't even have one?? What kind of bullshit is this?
- That means your state beverage is water, right?
  
  That means people in his state are cautioned aginst getting addicted to water

To be fair there only used to be about 3 different kinds of drinks when the USA settled the frontier: milk, whiskey, and laudenum
- don't forget (hard) cider and (slavery) rum

Being able to process cow's milk is a whole insane thing in white-supremacist circles.
- Is it like, only the pure Aryans can process lactose and the lactost intolerant are untermensch?
  
  Pretty much. It's all as stupid as it sounds.

The dairy lobby is no joke

This has got to be connected to how the dairy lobby got huge after WW2. Like this is probably connected to when the agribusiness lobbyists convinced the FDA or whoever to put a dairy category on the food pyramid.

Rare Alabama W
- That's what I thought, too. Like, how cucked does Kentucky have to be to not declare bourbon its state drink?

Arizona’s not being Tea is a travesty.
- AriZona iced tea is manufactured in new jersey
  
  Broke: Jews run the country
  Woke: Italians run the country
  
  I did not know that, in that case I’ll change my vote to New Jersey’s state drink being Arizona.

New Mexico straight up thinks this shit is stupid

A buncha mammons
I tell ye hwat

Please stand up to salute the flag and sip the state soft drink

Time for Illinois to make theirs malort

Imagining being a dairy farmer who started clapping his hands like a seal when this law was enacted in my state, thinking about all the future milk customers I'd get because of it.

lmao, Maine's is whatever this is https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moxie
and while Nebraska's official state beverage is Milk, they list the state soft drink as Kool Aid. which is fucking hilarious and instructive about Nebraska.
my guess is the Official "TV Show" of Nebraska is whatever VHS tape of a high school homecoming game from 1989 happened to be on the only TV in the state house when the law was passed in 1997.
- And Moxie originated “moxie”! As in “That kid’s got moxie!” And Moxie Crimefighter Jillette

Now batting, number 53... Melkyyyy
Ca-brerraaaa

71 comments