As you ask know, I've been a very passionate advocate for communism. I've been living the communist life for five years now. Sadly, things have come up in my journey that have forced me to reconsider what's best for me, my health, and my sanity.
It's important for me to talk about why I was a communist. My brother is a union organiser, and he's a committed, hardcore communist. I love my brother, and read bits of State and Revolution to fit in. I enjoyed all the great times and cool aesthetics of living the communist lifestyle.
Let me make a list of why I'm leaving communism:
Communism is a cult - There's so much violent rhetoric and hatred in communism. I prefer kindness around me, thank you. You get more honey with sugar than guns.
Communism is very restrictive - What I mean by this is that communism limits my choices. There's like ten words I'm not allowed to say as a communist? I just kept seeing my non communist friends saying all those words when playing League of Legends, and it felt so difficult to exclude myself.
Communism is unnatural - Lions have a hierarchical structure. Wolves have executive wolves and staff wolves. Ants have a class that derive their income entirely from investments. Beavers underpay exploited raccoons to produce commodities. Why shouldn't humans also engage in capitalism?
Communism is unhealthy - So these good communists I know get up at 7am to work their jobs five or more days a week. I tried this for almost a year, but my body kept telling me that this was unhealthy. So I started listening to my body, and now I'm a manager at my dad's company, and I just feel so much healthier not having to do a real job.
It's so difficult - As a white man who sometimes has to interact with women and non-white people, I often hear "that's kinda misogynistic" and "holy shit you're such a racist". Life is hard enough, I can't stop and think about everything I say and do.
It's for this reason that I'm leaving the communist lifestyle.
So these good communists I know get up at 7am to work their jobs five or more days a week. I tried this for almost a year, but my body kept telling me that this was unhealthy.
This unironically got to me. I have struggled my entire life to validate and and accommodate my own needs. I realized it was because my body was constantly screaming that something was wrong and it eventually just went numb. I’ve been trying to undo all this damage and the fact that working a 9-5 is literally too much for me despite me not having a choice is killing me. I can finally feel again, but my now principle stressor is something I can’t get rid of. It just makes me not feel like myself.
See if I knew not being a communist would solve this things would be a lot easier.
One friend I know does well by selling bullshit health services to rich people. Another friend works for military intelligence doing pointless statistical analysis. They're definitely succeeding by being capitalist dickheads, but still they're luckier than most.
I'm really sorry that work hurts. You have my permission to do quiet quitting. It does help meet our physical needs.
I often hear "that's kinda misogynistic" and "holy shit you're such a racist". Life is hard enough, I can't stop and think about everything I say and do.
Ok, you got me! My laugh woke up all the dogs in the house.