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Funny @sh.itjust.works

kersploosh @sh.itjust.works

12mo ago

Bro, size doesn't matter here

22 comments

It was a big signature, but wasn’t actually this big.
- You can tell it’s shopped because of the pixels
  
  The pixels are because this was written in 1776 and printers back then just weren't that good
  
  Was gonna make fun of Stephen Hopkins’ signature, but apparently he had cerebral palsy.
  He said, "My hand trembles, but my heart does not."
  
  You can tell it’s shopped because of the pixels
  It was right there in front of us the whole time.

Benjamin Franklin: Uhh, I think this is a pretty good plan, we should be able to pull it off this time. Uhh, what do you think Adams? Can you give me a number crunch real quick?
John Adams: Uhhh.. yeah, gimme a sec… I’m coming up with thirty-two point three three uh, repeating of course, percentage, of survival.
Benjamin Franklin: Uh…that’s a lot better than we usually do. Uhh, alright, you think we’re ready guys?
John Hancock: [interrupting Franklin] Alright chums, I’m back! Let’s do this… JOHNNYYYYYYYYYY HANCOOOOOOOOOOCK [furiously scribbles signature]
- Oh my God, he just signed it.
  
  At least i has't mine own chicken.
- Narration by Leroy Jenkins.

This was such a Chad move though. “I’m going to make sure the king knows exactly who I am with zero fucking doubt. No chance for me to weasel out of it pretending it might be confused for some other John. Come at me you royal bitch!”
- Yeah I'm pretty sure that's why he did it and why no one else got super mad about that.

And this is why signatures are named after him.
- My John Hancock isn’t as big 😢
  
  You're just not using your wrist right.
  
  Neither is my Johnson.

Okay, he's signing last next time.
- Proceeds to write over everyone else's signature

It's the best cursive J. I do mine like that on purpose.

22 comments