I don't know which one of you needed this information, but you're welcome.

friends, I went to see this motherfucker perform this album live on tour.

People say the only regrets in life are things you don't do... Then there's this.
I'm sorry.
- thank you. the encore was Wild Thing which you can replicate at home by varnishing a plank of wood and drawing a face on it, then grunting.
what a life experience
But…why?
Holy fuck I'm jealous
How much did you pay for the privilege?

Context: In addition to all the other lies he's told about his mythology (CIA asset, martial arts trained, whatever), he's also 120% Jamaican. If you add that up with all his other bogus claims about racial heritage, the man is over 1000% human. So of course he's able to do almost anything and super cool. Plus he shot a dog on that show where he played law enforcement, which is about the coolest thing anyone's done.

He's basically a god.

Plus he shot a dog on that show where he played law enforcement.
A+ vice-presidential material right there.
- Delete this. Everyone who read it: drink to forget. Captain's orders.
You forgot the parts where he drove an APC through the wrong guy's house, and also the part about the sex slave that escaped from his house.

I can never take Jason Statham seriously in his action movies after learning he was a painted up rave dancer in the background of multiple 90s music videos.

Yeah it's almost like he is... An actor.
- And was a dancer. And was a competitive diver. And was a fencer (the stolen goods kind).
  To your point, he honestly made me appreciate how actors have lives outside of the set.
The fact that it happened more than one time makes it so much funnier
- Makes it a job.
Best acting I’ve seen him do.
This is amazing. Thank you.
That fucking leopard print banana hammock 😂
You mean you can never not have a boner after seeing Jason because of these videos? Wait... What?
As soon as I learned that Crank wasn't cinéma vérité, I couldn't take Jason Statham seriously ever again.
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
music
videos
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

Me want da punani see for make me nice,
Me love the way you walk sometimes,
The way you talk is so hot,
Now you know let's have a shot of rum,
Then me can make you come
With me to the ocean
That would be phat
You can be my bow cat
Nice ital breeze
Bring you to your knees
We're jammin'

Without looking up the lyrics, i cannot tell if you're making this up or these are the actual ones.
- When the girls start to strut
  You could look at their butt
  You shouldn't do that
  The gyal dress is just as pretty
  Not just there to cover her kitty

Now go have a look at Chet Hanks (the spawn of Tim Hanks) many interviews in a Patois accent.

I don’t even know how I feel about things like this either. On the one hand it’s pretty cringe, but on the other can you imagine growing up with Tom Hanks as your dad, it’s a tough act to follow and it must be hard to find yourself.

Well, his other son seems to be doing fine
- Is that you making some kind of point?
  Nature and nurture I guess.
  My siblings and I couldn’t be more different and we all came from the same place. Like we differ in every metric you could conceive of.
I don't know if being known as a white rapper who is at the most generous interpretation doing cultural appropriation is really doing much of a follow-up to your dad.
I mean I realize that Jaden Smith is a weirdo with no talent, but at least he tried doing what his dad did before everyone made it clear that he shouldn't.
- Hey, I never said I agree with his choices. Just that I can imagine it being difficult to leave the shadow of your parents.
  Obligatory fuck Will Smith.

when the girls start to strut, and you look at her butt, you shouldn't do thaaat

I don’t think you meant it like this but I couldn’t help reading it in the cadence of “if you’re sliding into first and your pants are gonna burst, diarrhea” lol

Here ya go:

https://open.spotify.com/track/7AMX299eQzkQBqQ4vJp6Y4?si=4_61Tc7dQdKsHpznfqj1DA

I realize it's a fraction of a fraction of a cent we're talking about, but just on principle, is there a way to listen to this that doesn't end up in the pool of money that goes to Sagal?
- For others with the same concern, here's a direct link to a version I just pirated for you
  https://drive.proton.me/urls/JWAEHKSYKR#okNG7Vuiu1LF
- https://www.planetarygroup.com/do-artists-get-paid-every-time-song-played-spotify/
  Spotify doesn't count it as a steam if you turn it off before 30 seconds
- .
- Piracy
- That’s an excellent point!
I came here to laugh but that slaps. the chick singing is pretty damn good
- I agree that the girl who is singing is decent, but idk how you could say the song 'slaps'. It sounds like a kids bop remake of a reggae song or something.

Calling Jamaican English oder Patois an accent is a tiny bit derogatory, because it is its own language. It has its roots firmly in English, but it's not just "haha talk funny".

Not that Steven Seagull would care. Or should have tried to sing in Jamaican English. Or sing at all. Or do anything besides sit in prison forever.

I think in his case it's a patois. I don't think it's suggesting actual Jamaican English is.
- The point being made is that Jamaican Patois is a language, not an accent. It's an English Creole.

I needed this. Thank you

I am listening to this right now and holy shit.

It's not completely awful as I had assumed it would be. I mean the man can't act for shit, so I wouldn't have thought he could sing either. Especially in an accent.

No you're wrong, it's awful. The lady on the track is carrying the whole tune while Segal kinda just mumbles barely in key. But it's pretty on point for the Segal brand I suppose.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v4-zYghodc

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
https://www.piped.video/watch?v=3v4-zYghodc
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
https://www.piped.video/watch?v=3v4-zYghodc
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.