How Estrangement Has Become an Epidemic in America
How Estrangement Has Become an Epidemic in America
'According to our research, today, 1 in 2 adults is estranged from a close relative,' write Joshua Coleman and Will Johnson.
He’s a father of a 28-year-old son and he’s hurting. A retired police officer, he proudly voted for Donald Trump every time he ran and never hid his political beliefs from his family. “My son and his wife say that since I’m a fan of Trump they’re no fan of mine and cut me off,” he said. “Now I can’t see my only grandchild who I was so close to. It’s crazy and it’s tragic.”
It’s also increasingly common. The 2024 election spatchcocked the nation, widening a rift that was exposed in 2016 and put in an even sharper gulf four years later. Now, the hyper-partisan politics in the shadow of the 2024 election is breaking the bonds of families to a greater extent than ever before.
This suggests we may need to put in extra effort to take responsibility for our role in conflicts, show greater empathy for others’ values and perspectives
Hah! That's pretty much exactly what I've said to my (right wing) relatives on a number of occasions but it doesn't work. Does the author not realize that this perspective is very liberal?
Liberals and progressives are the folks with empathy that can't fathom how anyone could vote for Donald Trump; a well-known grifter, actual criminal, tax cheat, and total scumbag who cheated on all of his wives.
I have a ton of empathy yet I still don't understand conservatives. The only thing that makes sense to me is that they're authoritarian and their chosen authority tells them to hate certain people, that any given thing is a conspiracy, and that no government-run program is ever a good thing. But to tell them that to their faces is like telling them that they're stupid and suckers. To them it's incredibly insulting.
Yet when you try to figure out how they (someone who lives off Social Security) came to believe that, "Mexicans are stealing our jobs" it's the only thing that makes sense. They really are suckers. They may have been "smart" at some point in their life but not anymore. They choose how to vote based on anger at imaginary enemies and fake news.
Two-thirds of survey respondents agree that ending contact with a family member because of political beliefs is not justified and that most family fights over politics could be easily resolved.
Ah yes those pesky, abstract “political” beliefs shouldn’t get in the way of family. Such esoteric ideals like
- I believe in human rights.
- Rapists should not be in power.
- Nazis are evil.
Who could ever let a silly disagreement over politics spoil a relationship? /s
What are the odds this guy wept for the CEO and wants to see the suspect executed?
Maybe he just shouldn't be such a snowflake. As they say, facts don't care about your feelings, and the fact is that every single Trump voter tacitly approves of what a repugnant human being he is.
You are the company you keep.
Too bad, so sad grandpa. Do better. Be better. BE BEST.
I don't really care, do you?
Oh no! People are socialially ostracizing fascists.
Anyways, I hope it doesn't snow today.
he proudly voted for Donald Trump every time he ran and never hid his political beliefs from his family.
This sounds like an extremely euphemistic way to say he would not shut the fuck up about Donald Trump and his political beliefs. And his family likely gave him every chance in the world to quit that shit, and when they eventually just stopped wanting to be around him, he blamed everything but his own shitty behavior.
I don't know if that's what happened in his case, but it certainly sounds like it.
Celebrate adult children calling out their boomer parents on their hyperindividualist bullshit
When asked to reflect on how their actions and choices have lead to their families cutting them out, they responded "We've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas!"
Womp fucking womp
Yes, the grandfather is hurting and is clearly the victim. It cannot be due to his own choices and his children calling him out for being a shit person.
ACAB
"Choosing bonds of identity over familial obligations" has judgemental connotations.
The thing about "bonds of identity" is that those people respect your right to exist and your personal agency. The family that deserves to be cut off does not.
If you've had it explained to you multiple times why the decisions you make are harming the people you claim to love, and you don't change your behavior, don't be surprised when that person you say you care about tells you to piss up a rope.
How Assholes Have Become an Epidemic in America
It’s crazy and it’s tragic.
take a drink every time a narc parent uses the words 'weird' or 'crazy' to describe being treated like the horrible person that they are.
I'm having a hard time relinking narc to mean narcissist and not narcotics in my mind. 😔
Like so many problems in modern America, you can trace it back to Reagan.
Back in the day, it was important for politicians to try and maintain a civil tone with one another in public, no matter how much they despised each other behind the scenes. Reagan publicly used 'Liberal' as a pejorative and implied that those who disagreed with him weren't really patriotic.
Nah, the absolute god king and bastard father of ratbag politics is richard fucking nixon
These days, it's more like they're literally buddies behind the scenes while expressing partisan vitriol in public for show. It's fucking gross.
It would be more than that if people had a place to go and a way to get there.
Also it's not just trumpism, it's that your family can be intelligent but fall for grifters... or they will be kind 90% of the time and then without prompt will casually say something really fucked up at dinner.
Yup. Best I could do was to go to a friend's for Thanksgiving. Now it's back to hearing the 'all waking hours' fox news and talk radio.
This thing reads reads like the the person in the middle of the disagreement trying to broker peace.
Spatchcocked?
Gobsmacked, even.
If you're not spatchcocking your country, you're just wasting time and ruining it's breasts to save it's thighs, really.
Like a chicken. Where you split the breast so it can lay flat. To illustrate the deepening divide.
Removed our spines and flattened us to allow for more even cooking. If you remember when those dudes in black suits came around and did that to everyone, that's what this is referring to.