That headline is... incredibly inaccurate. They've pledged to each other to avoid porn, and have software that throws an alarm (visible to each other) if they view it.
"Monitor Each Other's Porn Intake" implies that they are seeking out porn and sharing it with each other, which is not what is happening here.
I think there are plenty of legitimate concerns here, but father and son sharing porn links is not one of them.
Also, I imagine young Mr. Johnson has at least 1 Android tablet or other burner device that is unknown to Dad.
I mean when I read "monitoring each other's porn intake" I assumed it meant "monitoring how much porn each other watches". And considering who it was, I assumed that was for the sake of making sure that they didn't watch any porn. I did not at any point think that they were sharing porn links with each other, because that's generally not what monitoring someone's intake means.
I, uh… I made the same assumption, but unfortunately it wasn’t sarcastic. I imagined it being like two bros that have an alcohol problem but don’t “believe” in rehab (whatever that means), so they make a deal to check each other’s recycle bins and call each other out when they’re not keeping it under 3 a day.
Right, because making your son your porn accountability buddy is an extremely normal and healthy thing to do.
How dare this article make it sound like such a healthy and normal thing is somehow extremely weird and creepy!?!
It's not like he had his wife holding him accountable for not looking at naked bodies online. That would be disgusting. No, like any upstanding citizen he wisely decided that he'd have it alert his son if temptation ever became too much and he looked at porn.
If only he had a parenting guide so that we could all learn to run a household in ways that will definitely not result in all the kids needing therapy down the road.
No, what monitoring in this context means is to be made aware of each other's porn INTAKE, or how much is being consumed and when, which the software is said to do. Nothing is suggesting they seek porn out to share content with each other, just that they are alerted when the other accesses porn.
I'd bet youre right about the alternative devices though.
In any other context, "monitoring intake" implies that the monitored party is consuming a quantity of the thing under discussion, and that the monitoring party is getting a report on what, when, and how much.
You wouldn't say "monitoring food intake" about someone abstaining from food, or "monitoring alcohol intake" about someone maintaining sobriety. You'd probably say "fasting" or "avoiding alcohol", or similar language. Such language should have been used here for clarity, IMO.
People on the thread are responding like they are reviewing each other's porn, because the language encourages that misinterpretation.
Yeah, I don’t really care if it’s none. “Hey son, I know we’re both going to be tempted to look at porn on the internet so I’m buying us an application that sends random screenshots from our computers to each other to ensure we don’t consume any. Please hold me accountable if you see any porn on there.”
Like no, that’s the most charitable and honest version I can think of and it’s still not something you should ask your kid to do. Even if the kid was 40, it’d still be fucking weird. Like you have a wife. Or presumably a church where they’d probably gladly help you with this.
But also why do you need this at all? The whole covenant eyes thing just as a concept concerns me. It’s like if teetotalers had random breathalyzers despite never having drank. AA isn’t that invasive and they’re already addicted. They’re acting not only like porn is the most addictive thing in the world, but like you’re inherently addicted to it for existing.
I would say "monitoring food intake" means "making sure there isn't too much". One can infer through context that "too much" porn to conservative Christians would be "any" porn. Given the context of who the article is discussing, I did not assume they were sharing porn with each other. I have not seen any comments where this was assumed, as well.
I'm not sure why the quote is getting you bent out of shape. "monitoring X intake" implies that someone is taking in X ("intake", definition 2 in Merriam Webster ), and it's being measured & reported ("monitoring"). It doesn't matter whether X is food or water or Youtube videos or porn.
It's just the wrong word here. I'm not saying it's history's greatest crime, just a bad editorial decision that leads to confusion.
I just looked into the app being used here, called "covenant eyes" and it seems your interpretation of the phrase is actually more correct, unfortunately that makes the headline even less misleading. You are indeed able to see and review exactly what content was accessed that set off the alert.
If you watch the "How it works" intro video on their site it seems they are literally monitoring and reviewing each other's porn intake.
Nah, I didn't read the headline thinking that they were sharing links with each other. It read to me like he and his son are holding each other accountable for how often they pleasure themselves with porn, and that's incredibly fucking weird and inappropriate. While I think it's generally a positive thing to be open and honest with your children, there is definitely a line. And this totally crosses that.
Yeah I was lucky enough to be raised by a sex positive mom. As a young child I called body parts by their names because they’re just body parts. Any questions I asked my mom got a truthful answer to the best of her knowledge and as appropriate as possible to my age. There was an understanding that if I was old enough to ask I was old enough to know. That was incredible for me. I have a healthy sex life in part because of this. I also don’t know anything about my mom’s sex life except for the time I found her copy of 50 shades, and the fact that my parents couldn’t stand each other for over a decade.
This is so much weirder and honestly depending on the son’s age it sounds like it could be adultification. A child shouldn’t be responsible for holding a parent accountable in general, but for this it’s just yikes
I think there are plenty of legitimate concerns here
Absolutely, Covenant Eyes is malware. Even worse, courts sometimes mandate it, eg in child custody cases. It's commercialised spying from a business that has proven itselt not trustworthy.
Also, everyone is reading this as some kind of creepy weird sharing kinks thing. Guaranteed this is just overbearing parenting 101. Anyone raised in or around extreme Christian groups reads this for what it is: child monitoring software and forcing your values on your kid.
I am sure your 17 year old signed up, wholly voluntarily, to not look at porn. I'm sure this wasn't pitched as, "I'll even do it too, and set it up so you get alerts for me!" Right as they took away a near adult's ability to explore his sexuality.