Alignment Chart Shitpost

Brother do you know what true neutral means

I disagree with most of these but that one most of all.

kleenex is too good, should be replaced for sandpaper

There is exactly 1 sheet in the box
#60GritLife
It's not just the discomfort it causes to the user, it's how high quality, non-dissolving paper fucks the sewer system for everyone.
I’ve had friends that used coffee filters because they forgot to buy TP :/

Chaotic evil would be a box of socks. Will it clog the toilet? Will it be effective? Will any even be used? Who cares, it's not my problem.

Yeah as someone who has left Kleenex, it wasn't to be evil, it was because there was no TP. Kleenex is chaotic neutral. Chaotic evil is leaving two $1 bills and a cactus.
Permanently Deleted

Lawful evil owns a cat.

Either I'm the luckiest person ever or this isn't as universal as everyone always makes it out to be. My house was always a multi-cat household growing up and I've got one cat of my own now. In total I've lived with 8 cats and my parents have had another 3 come in since I moved out. We have always aligned the toilet paper and not once that I'm aware of did our cats ever unroll it.
- Yeah same. I've had about 7 cats in my life so far (all long cozy lives from rescue kitten to old kittens). The first one tried it a little as a kitten then fell in the toilet and that fixed it. None of the others did
- Ive had 2 as a child and 4 as an adult. Only one of them has a penchant for it. He will go for it every opportunity he gets. It is dependent on personality, but flipping the TP around is a deterrent. In the bathroom he has access to I keep it in a cabinet.

Lawful good is chaotic good with a full roll already on. Neutral good stays the same. Chaotic good is a full roll on and lots of not yet empty rolls on the cupboard.

Lawful neutral stays the same. True neutral is with the roll the wrong way around. Chaotic Neutral can stay.

Lawful evil is Kleenex. Neutral Evil is just an empty roll with the text: "Just use the cardboard." Chaotic evil is either sandpaper or just a burning roll.

LE should be an empty roll with a magazine or newspaper on the shelf. NE should be empty. CE should be a roll of duct tape.
- I think LE should be 3 squares left. Technically not empty so no replacement, but definitely not enough.

Chaotic evil needs to be flushable wet wipes

So I have to keep my tp under the bathroom sink so my cat doesn't shred it. Where does that fit in this chart?

That's the actual true neutral. You're a druid.

This is me. Also that is a cupboard, not inside the bathroom.

There just wasn't a good place in my bathroom to put a bog roll holder. It would have had to be by my shoulder which is awkward to grab. It lives on the windowsill now.
- I use a faucet in the toilet.
  The TP is just for cleaning edges and corners that are hard to mop/broom/wipe.
  
  Or when I drop some egg innards.

TIL my wife is chaotic good with TP.

There's only one evil in this picture.

I'm printing this out. I have for young adults who can't grab the concept, but they understand D&D

I am very much "lawful good" to "lawful neutral" in general, but when I'm fostering kittens, the TP has to go in the cabinet above the toilet. Where does that land?

Kittens truly bring out the evil in all of us

I need flushable and non-flushable wet wipes on this.

Edit: I did not know that in some parts of the world "flushable wet wipes" and "wet toilet paper" are not synonymous and learned that e.g. the USA has a problem with companies being allowed to advertise their wet wipes as "flushable" not because it is okay to flush them but because one is able to.

It's not recommended to flush any wet wipes and companies that put flushable get away with it because you physically can flush the product
- I can flush 'em. God knows how fast the septic tank would fill up though.
- I do not know where you are from but if the flushable wet wipe, that is called "wet toilet paper"(translated) here, almost completely falls apart without the support of a sheet of normal tp, I am pretty sure that it's okay to flush it. Feel free to check out this product page. Edit: The link seems to be down now. No idea why. There are a lot of other examples, though. Here's the archived link.
They're both neutral evil since neither are flushable.
- Doesn't the problem stem from the fact that they are flushable?
where would you put them
- The trash? That's what I do. They create fatbergs as strong as stone that destroy your cities infrastructure: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=O4ECz4NPPf8
- I'd replace lawful neutral with the image from lawful good and use lawful good to add one or two packages of wet toilet paper.
  
  The non-flushable wet wipes alongside an empty roll could get added to the chaotic evil panel.
  
  And the chaotic neutral panel doesn't get anything.

Where does a washlet or a bidet enter into this?

Given that most people are commenting from their toilets, this is a weird fucking comic. Black619 is mostly right, but then there's you and I with our... wetworks.

Me, I'm calling bumgun + normal tp = CG.

bidet would be... NG.

Japanese toilet with bidet, blow drier, LCARS, etc: that's LG.

Chaotic good. Huh. Never would have guessed.

Napkins. Or kitchen towels!

Chaotic Evil is a roll of kitchen towels cut in half with a bread knife.

I would swap lawful good and neutral good honestly. Neutral good technically has more toilet paper available, and you can't always expect the roll in the holder to be brand new.

Its not just about quantity but effort too.

Lawful good has of a full roll on the spindle with no backup is technically the minimum good. No points deducted for that, but no points earned.

Neutral good still has a partial roll on the spindle, but they also went to the extra effort to provide an additional backup roll. Extra points for extra effort of supplying an additional roll when they didn't have to.
I'd change lawful good to chaotic good and make lawful good a combination of it and chaotic neutral. that's what I've always done at work when it was my turn to clean the bathrooms