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kamenLady. @lemmy.world

10mo ago

Elon Musk Reportedly Offered SpaceX Employees Sperm to Seed Mars Colony

Elon Musk Reportedly Offered SpaceX Employees Sperm to Seed Mars Colony

SpaceX employees' work is breaking barriers, while this asshat keeps terrorizing them with his utter gross bullshit

Edit: after reading through the article again, some passages stuck out, like:

Apart from aspiring to become the biological father for his Martian colony, Musk has leveraged many of his own businesses to create a civilization on Mars, including Boring Company tunnels to dig under the planet's surface and a Tesla Cybertruck rugged enough to traverse its mountainous landscapes.

So, take it all with a grain of salt.

*Emphasis mine

36 comments

He has a dozen kids already. This dude needs to get his fetish under control.
- And most of them don't like him.
  
  Almost everyone who's ever known him for more than 20 minutes knows he's a raging narcissist without the actual smarts to back it.

Elon proving once again he is a fucking moron

"No boss, we don't need your sperm. Please stop asking."

Elon totally has a my little pony in a jar.

Imagine going to Mars but it's just filled with Elon descendants.

The cyber truck is almost rugged enough to Brave the Home Depot parking lot (so long as it’s been recently paved.

Is anyone actually surprised? But ewww.

Best way to start a colony is with a genetic bottleneck.

What a jerkoff
- Yeah, this Elon guy sounds like a right wanker.

This is just colonial monarchy with extra steps Edit: castrate the rich
- I would like to sign up for a life of indentured servitude on Mars! The silver lining is it will be a short life.

TIL Elon keeps a cum jar.
- He uses it to spice up his cereal.

Elmo put it back in your pants...

Teslatubby wants to propagate

I offer everyone I meet sperm, it’s what makes me a great host.
- Here's your sperm
  
  I'd take Chevy Chase's sperm if it was given to me by Walton Goggins.

Inbred martians... Neat.

Imagine having the misfortune of not only being stuck on mars, but also having to share your genes with this greasy fuck.

"Just cup your hands" - probably.

Anyone know how much the additional ~30 pounds of a human man, compared to a human woman and a test tube of cum, would cost to fly to mars? How many women would each mission need to take to offset the weight of a precisely calibrated refrigerator full of spunk? If, upon arrival on mars, they immediately begin pouring cum all over the ground, how delicious would Elon’s tears be?

EwwwLon

He really does think he is Horatio from Endless Space.

I hope when we get to Mars we are over the whole car idea and can start building train and path tracks instead of doing suburb 2 electric bogaloo
- any real colonization will be corporate sponsored and whatever is built there will be the most urban hellscape you can imagine.
  
  "Sorry, your colony didn't pay the oxygen fee so we sealed all connections to other colonies"

More baby Elons?

If he/they did go through with this I’d start a GoFundMe to reward the employee(s) that successfully sabotages the effort, wether by substituting their own sample or any other verifiable means.

If I was a SpaceX employee, I would not accept sperm in exchange for seeding a mars colony

36 comments