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Lemmy Shitpost @lemmy.world

MacN'Cheezus @lemmy.today

2w ago

Pineapple was never the problem

93 comments

eh...I'd try it. But knowing that kiwi gets really mushy, I don't suspect I'd enjoy it. It's the fibrous nature of pineapple which allows it to stay in-tact after cooking, and kiwi is just going to make a mushy spot.
Maybe oranges could work if they were processed right...
- Yeah.
  Pineapple are like fibrous corpuscles of stored moisture for leftover pizza. A miracle really.
  Kiwi would be sauce.
- You could bake the pizza and then basically flash fry the kiwi slices seperately, a few minutes before the rest of the pizza is done, either in a seperate oven, or pan, and then throw those fried slices onto the pizza while the cheese is still cooling.
  I think I'd enjoy that.
- I've had 'fancy' Hawaiian pizza that had little mandarin orange slices. It didn't really work. Too juicy, and the orange flavor didn't mesh well with the rest of it. I'd also try the kiwi pizza just from pure curiosity, but also wouldn't have very high expectations.
  Pineapple is the perfect texture and flavor to go with all the other ingredients.
- I've made a kiwi pizza. Put some bacon and jalapeno and it's really good. It's more tart than the pineapple counterpart and really works well. I'd take it any day over a pineapple pizza
  I would dice it over slices though.
- I would disagree. If you roast them like tomatoes on pizze it might work. Consistency I mean. Bet it taste like trash.
  
  It does not

for fucks sake, just let people enjoy their damn food. This existing doesn't affect you. You can just, not eat it.
- Yup, and joke about it for fun.
- Heresy!!! The pineapples were a gateway to this abomination, and I know exactly the despair that follows... banging sheboys.
- For fucks sake. Just let people enjoy some jokes and mock rivalry
  
  I don't know if you know this, but the pineapple pizza thing is a trans allegory. I didn't decide that, it just is. Making jokes at the expense of a persecuted minority is not ok. Good comedy punches up, not down. My bad for forgetting again that internet communities don't do subtlety.
- No pineapple on your pizza, do you lack faith!

Meanwhile in Sweden: Enter banana
- Macaroni
  
  I know society expects me to dislike a macaroni cheese pizza, but that looks absolutely delicious.
  
  This is the one that bothers me more than anything. This is just cheese bread in disguise but uses four times the dishes to create.
  
  Brazilian lunch pizza
  
  ITT: People expanding Overton's window
- Fucking delicious.
  I completely turned around on these recently. Most also mix in pineapple.
  
  The combo I don't understand here is the banana+cheese
- Oh no...
- Plantain I could go for but dessert banana is a bridge too far. Caramelized plantains actually sounds like an excellent pizza topping.
- War crime.
- Eww why are the Swedes so weird

That shit would slap. Sweet and savory just doesn't jive with some people and that's fine. For the rest of us we get awesome food like pineapple on pizza. I wish everyone could know the pleasures we do.
- team pineapple is just not quite uniting with the haters on this.
  
  Team pineapple has adventurous taste buds.

I'd rather ally with kiwi on pizza people than work with pineapple on pizza haters.
- Especially if they make their food hate an unavoidable personality trait.

What's wrong, babe? You've hardly touched your kiwizza

Meh I have a feeling us pineapple enjoyers may actually like this. Only thing to make me unsure are the seeds. That texture might be odd on a pizza
Edit: typo

If we're talking pizzas that haven't been made, but probably should.
Ham and apple. The apple should be added cold after the pizza is taken out from the oven. Never seen it done, but it should work.
- Ooh, I like... I think you might want to add some sharp cheddar.
  
  Midwesterner spotted.
- There are lots of recipes online for pizzas with different kinds of fruit and meat. Pear with prosciutto and blue cheese is really good.
- Well, why don't you go and try it yourself before getting others involved?
  
  Why don't you join the fun instead? Gimmie a pizza suggestion instead of this weak lambasting.

Never had a kiwi that has been cooked. But tbh I would probably at least give it a try if someone made it.
- They're insanely tasty. Cook carefully on a nonstick pan and caramelize with a little bit of sugar and it's unreal. I've put it on French Vanilla ice cream with the chocolate sauce that turns into a shell, and I would literally punch babies if I could eat that every day without getting mega fat and having a heart attack
  
  Only got cast iron pans, nothing with PTFE.

Fuck it, slice me off a piece

OK, hear me out.
Roasted sweet red pepper rings, paprika, white onion, sliced kalamata olives, and light goat cheese.
Kiwi, super thin, not cooked but added as an after topping just enough to warm through.
Hot honey drizzle
- I've heard you out.
  I'll take all of that without Kiwi.
  
  that's fair
- No no yes no yes yes no
  
  I appreciate your input
  
  Ponpon shit! Ponpon shit! Ponpon shit! Ponpon shit!
- Feel free to give it a try and report back with the results.
  
  We're due for a pizza night anyway, need to teach the eldest how to do fermented dough. Also, I'm not sure kiwi are in season, will be a bit.
- gross

Ever since I saw this joke I have wanted to try kiwi pizza. I like kiwi. I like pineapple on pizza. Maybe kiwi on pizza is even better.

The kiwizza isn't real, it can't hurt you

I now acknowledge that pineapple is the gateway drug to this madness.

A pizza place here makes spaghetti pizza, yup like a 1/2" layer of spaghetti(with sauce) under the cheese..
It's not very good :/
- Spaghetti belongs in a taco, not a pizza.
  
  But, now hear me out... What if the spaghetti taco is then placed on a pizza?
  
  ... dad?
- A place near me does this. It's the worst. The spaghetti is chewy because it's dehydrated from being grilled.
- This is worse than the Mac and cheese pizza and twice as confusing.

- Those are called "Lunchables".
  
  Now i want a Lunchable wtf

No, now I have 2 enemies.

Nope. Nope nope nope 🤮🤮🤮

There are also people putting grapes on pizza. Any feeling about that?
- I think it’s kinda dumb, much like putting whole little tomatoes on a pizza It’s hard to get topping consistency from bite to bite and they’re likely to roll off.
  Taste wise, everyone’s different, I’m not going to judge in that aspect.
- only if theyre sliced like olives.. to maintain integrity. from a taste perspective.. directly to jail. no trial required.

I would eat the shit out of that

Blasphemy

Clearly written by a non-pineapple eater, can't fathom that they just gave us pineapple eaters inspiration

Kiwizza is too far

Put some pepperoni on it and we got a deal.

I don't personally care for pineapple on pizza but I would eat the hell out of this. It looks delicious.

I'd rather have the bird or the people

As if pizza normally didn't upset my stomach enough

Kiwtf?

93 comments