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ByteOnBikes @slrpnk.net

13h ago

I don't know who The Rizzler is and Im not interested.

46 comments

At least “curtains for” would mean something to him though.

I’m under 20. I feel the same way.
- We have reached the singularity. Congratulations.
- I'm 29 and same. I mean even if you understand what they mean they often sound ridiculous.

I am 40 and I know who The Rizzler is.
It's me. Because I've got a bussin' gyatt. Don't think so? That would be Ohio, fr fr. ONG I got that skibidi rizz.
- Agh i am having to fight my instincts to downvote and I'm not even a prescriptivist dammit. When did I get so old.
- Is this what having a stroke feels like?
- Buddy here's goated with the sauce lk
  
  no cap

Oh man...remember when satire news publications had articles of bat boy on the front page because politics weren't as absurd yet?
- I miss those magazines. I love absurdity, and I'd beg my mom to buy them for me. She wouldn't and said they were trash, and not real.
  I know. Thats why I want them. I don't want real news. I never asked her to buy a newspaper. I want to read how Bigfoot was caught bathing in a bird bath in northern Canada. Yes, I was 7, and knew the difference between this and reality. But I love absurd fake shit.
  I spent the 90s watching pro wrestling where an undead wizard faught his own long lost brother, who was thought to be dead decades ago after the undead wizard burned his whole family alive inside the family owned funeral home. Turns out his brother was kept locked in a basement to hide his scars, and now wears a mask to hide his disfigured face. And somehow, because he was burned alive as a child, he now is able to summon fire, which is just as plausible as his brother being able to summon lightning.
  I know most of you don't watch pro wrestling. I get that it's not for everyone. BUT! After reading that summery of an actual decades long storyline, if you EVER ask a fan of pro wrestling if they know it's "fake", you're even dumber than you think we are.
  Point is, I love these magazines, but at some point they gave up. They couldn't be more absurd than real life.
  Absurdity is dead.

50s dude could uno-reverse card that shit by breaking out the slang from his own teen years. Get all the gens conversing this way in one thread just for pure chaos-sake.
- We definitely had ridiculous slang in the 80s and 90s, but the truth is I always felt like the media over-played it trying to sound cool. And when we'd over-play it amongst ourselves it was as a way to laugh at adults.
  Can you jam with the console cowboys in cyberspace? Cowabunga. Some of my favorite stuff had excessive references to skateboarding, roller blading, or other Xtreme sports (Hackers, anyone?) and that's coming from a guy who used to be a part of that scene.
  Maybe I'm wrong. If I am that wouldn't be fetch.
  Edit: my drunk ass doesn't know the difference between all of the 80s and 89.
  
  Stop trying to make fetch happen. It's not going to happen!
  
  We definitely had ridiculous slang in the 80s and 90s,
  Dude, it was radically tubular.
  
  I mean, cyberspace is at least a genuine term made by Gibson. The rest...

He is 13 and his wiki page has an early life section. ☠️
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baby_Gronk
- to be fair, it doesn't have many sections at all, so this checks out 😄
- Madden San Miguel
  June 4, 2012 (age 12) Frisco, Texas, U.S.
  Theres a lot to unpack from lil Gronks info there.
  
  12yo and already have a "controversies" section on the wiki page.
- If this isn't a sign of the decline in Wikipedia I don't know what is. Like it's not even his channel it's his dad's.
  
  Why would that be a sign of wikipedia's decline?
  Should they not document a famous figure? It doesn't matter whether it's ridiculous or not, value judgement is not an encyclopedia's place to do

It's me, I'm the Rizzler
- Rizzle me this, rizzle me that, who's afraid of the big, Gronk bat?
  
  Livvy Dun?

At first I was like:
...then I saw this:
And began to realize that things were about to get bad...
I didn't realize the drama, the pathos:
The good times:
...and the bad:
After much contemplation, I realized there was only one meme I could post in defense:
- I'm a simple man.
  I see GROND
  I upvote/compliment.
  GROND
  
  grond

I'm glad k-smog and batboy made up and are flipping grunts together again.

Looks like Jabba the Hutt's translater broke down again.

relevant
- I like purple stuff

Yes, baby gronk actually exists.
- We don't even know who adult Gronk is.
  
  Im sharing this only because i learned it and im forcing you to know too.
  Robert James Gronkowski (born May 14, 1989) is an American former professional football tight end who played in the National Football League (NFL) for 11 seasons. Nicknamed "Gronk", Gronkowski played nine seasons for the New England Patriots, then played his final two seasons for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
  
  Isn't he a football player?

Mr.Rizzlectric, send this gyatt to the skibidi dimension and have him Ohio'd.

Fo rizzle

46 comments