[Not the Onion] The "I can bend spoons with my mind" guy threatened Greta Thunberg.

Do NOT get in a psychic duel with Allah he is too powerful!

The username is too on the nose for this to not be satire.
- I think you'd need to know when this was posted, there's both good and bad feminist movements trying to reclaim this sort of language by this point

i like to imagine this guy "stopping" greta by bending her spoons while trying to eat soup but having no other way to stop her so now greta is soupless and mildly inconvenienced but still goes to gaza undeterred

Undetected by the Israelis - an intrepid reporter in a wetsuit somehow snuck onto the ship as it was moving. After he dries off he interviews Greta in the galley.
Intrepid reporter: "So, Greta - how are things?"
Greta: "I am soupless and mildly inconvenienced but we continue onward undeterred."
Intrepid reporter: "Soupless?"
Greta: "Uri Geller - the 'I can bend spoons with my mind' individual - is apparently capable of long-distance telekinesis. My spoons have been rendered inoperable."
Intrepid reporter: "Um... I can't tell if you're joking or not."
Greta: "I would not joke about such things."
She simply picks up a fork and starts eating a salad, rendering him powerless
Greta drinks directly from the soup bowl
- I'm picturing a looney toons-esque scenario where she keeps taking a spoonful and he keeps bending it, dumping out the soup each time, then accelerating until the bowl is empty. Maybe in a fury she dunks her head in the pot and slurps it up directly.

Does anyone live in this fake state who isn't a fraud, pedophile, nazi or grifter?

but fake state full of pedos and grifters gets billions in bombs and ammo, very healthy!
- The only person I'd take seriously there is that fresh wizard in the blue

Uri Geller to post

I'm too lazy to photoshop an alakazam at a computer, but you get the idea

Uri Geller was already the worst person. Truly, his gift of being a piece of shit is a form of magic itself

Here's the neat thing Uri. She's trying to feed people in Gaza, so how about you shut the fuck up

Why is it that the worst people live for so long? I thought he was dead for some reason

I'm genuinely curious what these Zionists fear the boat is going to achieve? You'd think it had an armed nuclear warhead on board by how much they are freaking out about it.

Honestly? I genuinely believe they want the Palestinian people to feel they've been rejected and abandoned by the world; I recall seeing Israelis singing at Palestinians that Saudi Arabia and other Arab countries abandoned them. They want Palestinians to lose any shred of hope; it's not enough for them to kill and torture them, they want to completely kill them mentally and spiritually; they're waging a war against literally every human aspect of Palestinians they can.
I recall a now infamous podcast episode by an Israeli duo called 'two nice Jewish boys' where one of them (who worked closely with Netanyahu) was saying it means everything to Israelis to know they're living their best lives while Gazans are experiencing hell on earth; that aspect, that Gazans are suffering while their lives (Israelis) are great, makes them extremely content.
- I wish people like this would receive even one percent of the pain they inflict on others to come back to them