I fucking hate how every appliance has to connect to the wifi now. It's a fucking grill! It grills burgers! I don't want to try to grill a burger only for the bloody thing to brick itself because of a bad firmware update!
the wifi is critical for connecting your burgers' datamodeling to azure services and getting multivariate analytics on global burger output, regional cheese differentials, and go-to-market scenarios that will tee up deliverables ahead of the curve.
getting realtime feedback on all your key burger characteristics for a user demand driven production experience will enhance your operational efficiency through a strategic optimization of production framework. Nothing satisfies hunger like benchmarking cloud-ready synergies.
What. Charcoal grills are just metal boxes you put burning stuff in, it's not like there's a flow of gas from a tank to be regulated or any sort of control to it, it's just lumps of carbon that are on fire.
This must be the next way to market to insecure bazingas after "dude wipes:" things that were already seen as "manly" now getting a techbro bazinga veneer on top of that.
Trucks? Already "manly." Time to ZYBERTRUKKK it! After all, it's what John Blade Runner would drive!