Snopes says that this is unconfirmed, but the rumor persists.
Snopes says that this is unconfirmed, but the rumor persists.
104 comments
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It was in a book of papal facts my very Catholic childhood friend had on the bus one time, so I buy it. One additional aspect I remember is that they call them by their Christian/given name when they hit them.
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This is false! Everybody knows that they smother the pope's face with a huge hoe's ass to confirm his death.
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Popehammer is my favorite Elder Scrolls artifact.
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Jesus allegedly came back, they aren't taking those kinds of risks these days
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Do you know how many more murals they'd have to paint?
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+5 damage and THAC0 against undead (Pope)
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you know it's an ancient artifact when it uses THAC0
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Plot twist: THAC0 bonus actually reduced your THAC0
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This felt like a personal attack
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"One" hit
"Two" hit Pope: "Ouch!"
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"What do we do now?" "Just hit harder, it's a self-solving problem"
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"Three" smash Pope: "OUCH!!!"
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"Now what?"
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Pope Says he's feeling better now...
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Is it to make sure, or is it to make sure?
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The MitreSmiter 9000. Puts all doubt to rest.
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They should abstain from the hammer this time round. Zombie pope is the 2025 twist no-one would see coming.
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The hammer is in fact eight feet long.
They're making really sure.
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+3 to hit vs. Popes, Cardinals, and Bishops. On hit, Popes who are alive but playing dead must save vs. Fortitude or die.
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Hit him once. If he is silent, hit him again. If he is silent again, hit him again. If he remains silent, he is dead.
Hit him once. If he shouts, you've got two more swings to make him stop.
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"I fear the Pope has died!"
"You can't say things like that! You have to be sure!"
*wham-"Ack!!" wham wham
"OK, I'm sure the pope is dead."
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my favourite fact is that “factoid” doesn’t mean “little fact” but is actually starting to mean that
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What does it actually mean?
Edit: Nevermind, @jerkface@lemmy.ca already answered.
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In this case it seems to fit pretty well.
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Bang bang Vatican's gilded hammer came down on his head
do do dooo do
Bang bang Vatican's gilded hammer made sure that he was dead
whoa-o whoa-o whoa-o whoa-o-
Pope Joan was quizzical...
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The hammer is actually a 100lb two handed weapon
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What about the holy hand grenade?
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First shalt thou take out the Holy Hammer. Then, shalt thou strike three times, no more, no less.
Three shalt be the number thou shalt strike, and the number of the striking shall be three. Four shalt thou not strike, nor either strike thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out.
Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, thy pope shall snuff it.
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HAAAALELUJAH
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I have one of these on my coffee table that’s decoration. Found it just laying in some room when I visited the Vatican in the 90s. Weird.
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So it's correctly labeled as a factoid then
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The -oid suffix is used to describe something that appears like something else, but is not that thing. An asteroid is something that looks like a star, but isn't. A factoid is something that looks like a fact, but isn't.
I used to introduce my common-law partner as my "wifeoid." She hated that but sometimes it is okay to put your own pleasure first.
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D'oh, it should say "another target Cleric" to avoid confusion.
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Well you have to be sure. I wonder where they keep the Pope hammer in between deaths
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Maybe the pope gets a bonk every day to ensure that he is, in fact, still alive?
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Only if he's sleeping VERY soundly.
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Could be, it's the only bonk he'll get
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In the popemobile trunk. Obviously...
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He carries it under his pointy hat
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The Hammer of Pope-o-cles.
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Live your life such that they have to verify your death
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I bought one of those at Harbor Freight for like ¼ the price the Vatican probably paid.
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I was just thinking that Stanley Tools should capitalize on Stanley’s success and release a line of replica ceremonial tools backed by a viral campaign instead of suing them for their success.
I would probably buy a replica pope whacker, the U.S. congressional mace if virally advertised, or even a golden shovel, engraved with a jaunty nihilistic saying, like “Digging my own grave!”
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I got a golden shovel for Christmas 2017. I was (am) obsessed with twin peaks and my wife made one for me like from the show (the comeback season or whatever). Because I have to dig myself out of the shit.
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Clearly an anti zombie tool. Can't have the pope rising from the dead, it'd mess up the church's image.
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The ancient custom of throwing the body into the Tiber river is too unrefined for these modern times
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The papal tappy taps
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I prefer the Holy Ball-Peen.
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Looks like a scaling hammer, like you'd use to knock the scale off a weld. Maybe an allusion to Saul/Paul and scaly eyes?
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The silver hammer of Saint Maxwell.
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Location, location, location
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Bing, Bong, Witch is dead!
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That is some Guilliman level artifact
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I wish I wasn't at work on mobile... I really want to take that chart of hammers posted on Lemmy a few days ago and add the dead pope hammer lol
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And then, are they embalmed through the rectum?
Curious minds indeed!
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This little hammer reminds me of one from the black company books where a group of assassins after they kill someone use a cerimonial hammer to break their bones and burry them in a tiny hole so fast they often go unnoticed
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unconfirmed is not debunked
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Well, you see, there was this one time when...
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I would rather quit while am ahead?
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Midsomnar reference?
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i like how, by changing one letter, you've created a new compound verb that basically translates to "halfway into the action of falling asleep"
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They can provably clarify when they wake up
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104 comments