Lemmy Shitpost @lemmy.world SSTF @lemmy.world 1 yr. ago

the future is now, old man

50 comments

Where do I become a holy fool?
- Your local church
- Right? Like does it come with good benefits and a 401k match too? I mean I'm already sold but the highwayman job is quite lacking in that space. Asking for a friend
  
  Have you seen those televangelists? They make fucking bank.
I didn't realize train robber was still an option
- An entire life of shennigans and mischief wasted, I COULDA ROBBED TRAINS?!
  
  Also coulda been robbing banks with an avocado, but like me you've been mooching around like a goddamn chump....
- Why do you think public transportation is popular with the youth?
- Well the goods have become larger and heavier, you'll probably need to kidnap the train before you can rob it.
  
  I suppose I could utilize a larger train to kidnap the train
- It was never NOT an option.
  
  We do still have trains, don't we?
"I wanna be TikTok when I grow up."

"You want to make content for TikTok?"

"No! I want to be the app!"
- It sounds stupid, but kids are stupid. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a police car. Not a cop, the car. Sometimes dreams need to stay dreams.
  
  Well, have you ever seen a police car break any laws? Your dream was great, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
  
  Never give up on your dream, it might just be possible with enough cybernetics and plastic surgery! The future is now!
- As a young boy I dreamed of being a baseball.
- I want to be a firetruck
  
  I'm Idaho
- "I want children to be addicted to touching my body with their grubby little hands"
  
  A few Catholic priests, salivating, enters the chat.
Up yours, woke moralists! We'll see who cancels who
- Cancellation incoming
- related
Just the stuff thats visible here is already more than 100% lol
- Which is why you don't see "mathematician" on the list.
- Maybe some kids want multiple jobs
  
  No one wants two jobs, but the kids these days know they'll need it
Woke moralist. The destroyer of Jordan Peterson.
- Pretty sure that was the benzos
  
  Woke Moralists and Benzos handshake meme: Destroying Jordan Bitchass Peterson
Hey fellow kids! Who wants to be a woke moralist, amirite?

(e: I had a son, so I do believe the 11.9% train robber stat, tho)
- Had? I hope you’re ok.
  
  Oh no, he’s fine. Poor choice of words; he’s all grown up now is all.
I'm a wojak artist.
- Prove it
  
  Here's a creation of mine.
- What the fuck is wojak?
  
  Here are some examples:
Real human bean
I guess my toddlers aren't main stream then. One wants to be a policefiremantruck and the other a snail tamer.
- Snail tamer sounds like an amazing job
  
  Its very dangerous. A feral snail can be more deadly than the monthy python rabbit. The tend to be cool tho
Dang those kids can spell Beaureaoucrat
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