Skip Navigation
58 comments
  • Computer hardware and administration are probably my best subjects worth teaching.

    I'm certified and have plenty of industry experience. I could even bring my own hardware for lessons.

  • History

    It's due to my passion for the subject and hope that I could cultivate the tools for critical thinking in young minds.

    That being said I'd be terrible at it.

    -First day of School

    -Students: Good morning MisterNeon.

    -Me: Cram it you little shits! Today I'm going to teach y'all why Mexico is cool. Anybody who says the words "aliens" or "giants" is getting thrown through a window.

  • Common sense/critical thinking 101.

    It is utterly baffling watching some people just bumble through life completely clueless.

    I have lost track of the number of adults who have no clue how do their taxes. They either have their parents do them or they pay someone to do them for themselves. I consider myself basically financially retarded, but I still learned the bare minimum to be able to do my own goddamn taxes.

    People don't know the bare minimum about their vehicles and it ends up costing them thousands.

    People are oblivious to their surroundings and never prepared for anything even slightly.

    People just do things without a single thought towards the potential consequences of their actions.

  • Encambulators, both Turbo and Retro.

    After progressing we may touch on Volt Xocula, encased framdrives, or a logarithmic conductual shafts, but I'd always bring it back to Encambulators because its such an important topic.

    • In college I would teach the latest quantum encabulator technology. I would open the class by hiding in a box and the students wouldn't know if I was actually alive in the box until they opened it. At which point I would demonstrate the process of using a matter translation array and quantum encabulation to be able to find the answers to such things without having to actually open the box by way of deterministic reality differentiation using a standard wainscotted multiversimeter.

  • English, because word history is fun, communication is important, and teaching kids that language is constantly evolving would be fun.

  • Assuming I'm given time to brush up on it, math probably. Algebra, Geometry, and Trig. I was good at those and enjoyed tutoring math when I was in college. Calculus is awesome but I'm too dumb to teach that to anyone.

  • Computer programming and related tech skills. Why? Because I've been doing as a job and for fun for over 35 years and have been teaching it for 5 so I guess it works out.

  • My choice would be to teach English literature, finances made me teach all manner of computer classes. :)

  • Phonics. The current curriculum is based around sight-reading, meaning students are told not to sound out words they don't recognize. The effect of these have cascaded down the rest of these students' lives, and now we are seeing a wave of Uni students who are nearly illiterate. I'm getting a degree in elementary education and I'm proud to say that I'm going to be doing my part to fix the problem.

58 comments