They are too expensive and gimicky either way

Buy a used older model if you need a machine. Because it's cheaper, because it is more basic in its components, because those parts are probably cheaper to buy and replace yourself if need be, and mainly because someone is selling it at its age because it STILL works. Anything tied to a circuit board with a processor is a time bomb.

Yeah but washing machines either use a really simple micro controller or a whole load of really complex voltage based logic and control board electronics that even the guy who designed it couldn't fix without a lot of writing notes and doing maths.

There's more to go wrong on an old washing machine and each control board was unique to the machine so tracking down a replacement is hard - a nice simple raspberry pi Pico you can flash over WiFi would make it so easy to switch out one heater for another without too much thought about impedance or upgrade the turbidity sensor without desoldering resistors.

Plus it gives you infinite control over the program cycles allowing you to update up the best wash method for your detergent and lifestyle.

Of course you can only do that with an open source one. I think it's coming, year of the open source desktop kitchen work surface coming soon.

What do people even do with their wifi appliances?

Timing, automatic and stuff. To keep the washing machine example: you want the laundry out of the machine as soon as possible go hang it up as fresh as possible. You're having a long day ahead of you, not a long time between coming home and going to bed, not enough for a full laundry run at least. You load up your machine before leaving home and remote start it the adequate time so it's done shortly after you're back home.
At least that's what I'd use such features for.
Other people listen to Spotify over their fridge.

I don't connect mine .

But I wanted a washer dryer that had a heat pump drying system.

The one I got on sale also had an auto dosing tray for detergent and softener.

Genuinely very pleased with all the features my "smart appliance" has.

It uses less power, less water, less detergent. And it weighs and uses humidistats to not over dry my clothes.

The dumb ones that just work on set timers are less efficient than one measuring the load to decide how much water to use and when it's dry.

I suppose I used to eyeball detergent but now a 40 wash bottle lasts me 50 washes.

Long warranty on it I hope I'll never have to test. But it's there.

To get that I ended up with a WiFi enabled machine and just never put it on a network and turned its own broadcast off.

I occasionally set a time on it. But genuinely throw in the clothes, push 2 buttons, and walk away.

Any appliance that can now be a heat pump instead of an element, or actually measures things instead of using timers is a genuine improvement. Even if it's fairly rudimentary still.

Not everything is worse if it's more complicated.

I have a wifi washer and dryer.

The biggest advantage is that it sends you a ping when it's done, and can send you a message about the need for routing maintenance, like changing filters or refilling the detergent container.

Settings wise, it's slightly easier to set from the app, since a telephone has better UX than a washing machine. Mostly I just leave it at "you figure it out" so it's moot.

You can't actually start it remotely unless you press a button on the machine first, just send settings to it to activate by pressing start.

I got one of these after my Samsung literally caught fire and it is... fine. Kinda small, loud, and beeps incessantly sometimes when nothing is running to the point I have to unplug it at night lest it go off at 4am again. Has yet to explode so soft recommend from me

This thing is legit, but why is their example photo showing a laundry machine next to a kitchen sink as part of a whole kitchen set up lol

Hey, that's our new metal band name: Speed Queen!!

Why would you abuse a washing machine? How much do you have to wash that such a machine would not be a complete waste of resources and money?

You don't buy a truck just because every container is moved by trucks when all you transport is yourself and a bag.

Only reason I have a smart washer and dryer is so they can send me a notification when they finish their load. As someone with ADHD and anxiety that's a godsend.

This applies to all machines really. More parts means more things to go wrong.

Our dryer wasn't working very well so we got a temporary one for $100 from Craigslist, but turns out it runs great and we have no desire to replace it.

I mean... It's not absolutely necessary? Yes.

It's nice that it alerts you is finished specially taking into account it doesn't always takes the same time and all that ? Yes

A beep or similar works too? Yes, but sometimes you are not near enough or similar and could be useful.

Or starting it remotely so when you reach home just finished or nearly and just arrive and hang the clothes.

I worked for an industrial tool manufacturer for a couple years. It's well known brand but not one you can just go to Home Depot and buy. Their tools are very specialized and very expensive.

Anyway, the last project I was on before I left was one where they tried to create smart tools. It wasn't a completely bad idea. Those things have specific maintenance requirements. Reminding the user that it's time for maintenance based on a cycle count, hour count, or severity of conditions was actually a good idea.

But, management wanted two things: Wireless charging, and the ability to feed data from the tool back to a dashboard that the user could log into. Then, they would charge a premium for the "smart tool" and get the customer to pay for access to the dashboard. At least that was the idea. The problem was that customers didn't give a shit about either of those "features." They just wanted their tools to work reliably. The division president refused to listen. I don't know how it worked out. For unrelated reasons, I didn't hang around long enough to find out.

Adding [unnecessary] electronics to tools and appliances is cheap. There's some engineering costs involved but once that's done, the components usually amount to a small fraction of the overall build cost. And the markup is insane, which is one reason why they add those "features".

I suspect that there's plenty of engineering teams out there questioning why a stove needs WiFi and then getting overridden by some SVP who has literally never used a stove in his entire life.

That's easy.

You are privacy conscious in those unnecessarily rich parties you got invited to by mistake.

You are poor for your homies and family.

By a used one I suppose.

you put the router in the washing machine. of course, you have to poke a hole for the cables, since the router has no wifi when its turned off.

then, you turn the washing machine on. water should be enough but if you want to be safe you can put salt.

when the machine beeps you'll have successfully washed the wifi away from your router.

Probably b/c if they can't monetize your data, then they choose to profit from you in other ways. :-(

I mixed my colours with my whites

And now I fight the tie-dye fight

Do dumb TVs still exist at all?