Since America is bringing back kings what other kind of stuff is on your medieval wishlist?

Fucking castles, duh

Trebuchets, which btw are far superior to catapults.

Winter

Beheading kings.

Magic of course.

None of you dumb fuckers has any idea what "medieval" means.

I just really like walking around eating giant turkey legs.

Perpetual stew, good architecture, and no Twitter

Syphilis

Child labor.

Oh, wait…

Bring back duels!

Inns, especially if they've got an enormous pot of perpetual stew, and people are giving out quests.

I unplug for a few days and this pops up on my feed. ??????????

Everybody needs guillotine.. That says something!

I recently got into armored combat so, knights. If we're gonna kill each other, let's at least be civilized!

Our leaders fighting in the wars they start.

You wanted it... go fucking get it cowards.

Tavern wenches of course

Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords as a basis for a system of government.

Royal beheadings

Public stockade.

Landsknecht fashion.

Guillotines obviously.

Bacchanalia

Peasant uprisings, to take down the kings of today.

Chaperon hats.

Oh oh oh oh oh oh!
JOUSTING!

We can do it with motorcycles this time instead of horses!

OH ALSO

Private Military contractors should begin to dress like crosses between clowns and noble-knights again.

(hours later addendum) Bowing as a form of social greeting. We REALLY missed a beat when we didn't bring this back when COVID made people afraid of getting too close to each other.

Guillotines.

Cloaks would be cool. I know that's more of a fantasy aesthetic than a medieval one but they are cool enough that it shouldn't matter.

Scaphism, but specifically for corrupt politicians.

My non-joke answer is apprenticeship. Kids could actually learn how to do a valuable job rather than graduating from high school with almost no useful skills.

Having most of the year off for festivals and holy days

Catapults, just to irritate the trebuchet people.

Regicide.

Dueling. I say we use it as an option to reply to a civil lawsuit. Able bodied adults only, no proxies, and if you refuse then you have to do a trial and they can weigh your refusal as evidence against you.

Swords only, no guns.

A blowtorch and a pair of pliers.

Fucking guillotines already

The stockade is something we desperately need. Some people need to learn how other people see them. Driving 50mph in a living area, stockade. Making a lot of noise at 6 in the morning, believe it or not, stockade. Being a racist cunt, straight to the stockade.

Random pedestals with swords driven into them lol

Kings, plagues, private armies (more late medieval and renaissance, but you get the idea), career military with hi-tech weapons tearing apart barely armed peasants. Idk, OP, seems like we got almost everything covered

Weird ass slices in public parks everybody has to garden in. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Open-field_system

Doug Rushkoff had a talk where he called out local currency as a thing he’d like to bring back from the medieval.

Exclusive to the community, and only valid for a short period of time, so you can’t hoard it or siphon the wealth to another community.

Can we get guilds back?

Bathhouses. The local Quicklee's just doesn't do it.

I guess we could use a little ice age right around now, and it would also be nice to have a Renaissance around the corner.

Someone said inns and taverns, and yes it's a missing piece of housing here - long term hotels with food, bars/restaurants with rooms to rent above.

Not much though, it is not a time I'd visit.

Mandatory longbow training for yoemen and yoewomen. Let's get those skills trained up in case we're ever facing a charge of French knights.

"Mein Lehnsherr..."

Royalty and nobility taking part in actual on-the-ground warfare. I'd be curious if that would have any effect on military operations...

Owning land without any taxes or anything.

Im pro taxes but hey, when in Rome…

I could be down for small beer being the main thing we drink.

Cloaks and leather boots

Hand to hand combat

The commons

Guillotines for kings

Moats. I was kidding at first, but I'm now thinking lazy rivers are modern moats.

Free time

Trebuchets - the superior siege engine. (Disclaimer: probably not medieval)

Horses as transportation.

Receiving land for farting good.

Dragons

Sorcery, alchemy, soothsaying, baby. Come one come all I'll cure what ails you. I'll summon portals and turn lead into #gold.

Or maybe the town crier. Hear ye, hear ye, elon musk hast tweeted about his balls.

Things made out of pewter

i want to see straight guys duel to get straight women.

Guillotines

I would love it if taverns became a thing again, but only if they kept the time period theme up.

A vast patchwork of incredibly different lifeways that you can flee to whenever then taxman and his goons come round.

Grand journeys to far off lands. The kind of journey where someone who is "exotic" and personable can make a life for themselves by being the court foreigner.

Also: Judicial duels. They are unjust, unethical, and unproductive, but damn if I don't want to see white collar criminals have to fight the selected champion of all the folks they ripped off. Of course, being a billionaire would probably buy you a pretty good champion yourself, so we'd also have to bring back old concepts of honor to compel them to represent themselves.

I wouldn't mind bringing back public executions.

running the gauntlet

Trebuchets as a valid defense option

Debtor's prisons