Parents: “son its ok if you’re gay, we know its hard being different in a small town like this but youre still our child and we will always love you no matter what”
Me: “mom, dad, i’m not gay.”
Mom: “really? you sure about that?”
Dad: “you’ve literally never had a girlfriend and would be the only straight guy in town who hasnt. hell even most of the gay kids have had a beard at some point.”
Me: “i’m not gay… i’m just horribly depressed and have zero self esteem.”
Mom: “shit. whoops. i suppose we better find you a therapist then.”
I mean, your parents thought of you, tried to connect, listened, then started lining up care.
Parents be winning.
If you thought you'd get out of your teenage years without death-by-embarrassment, you're kidding yourself.
To connect with you, my parents discovered the evidence of long term daily self harm when I was in a bike crash and was unconscious. They otherwise believed me happy and healthy. That wasn't a fun conversation in the hospital, with a concussion.
As a parent, most of us just want to help, but it's incredibly hard to know what's going on inside your head.
I was a kid once too, and I know how hard dealing with parents can be. But I also know that every time I opened up, they attempted to help. Give it a shot, unless they're actually abuse.
I acknowledge the possibility of attractive people being involuntarily celibate, but I suspect that is is much less likely than for unattractive people.
My mom would randomly ask me "what do you think about <whatever hot celebrity happened to be on TV>. Yea mom, I'm not gay but I'm not talking about this shit with you either.
This just makes me think of all the times my mom accused me of being high years before I ever touched any drugs every time I would ask for something to eat because I was hungry.
One of my sisters once told me she was proud of me for being out with my bisexuality.
When asked, she said it was because I am liberal, and often refer to the people I date as partners. Then I had to explain to her what nonmonogamy was, and I’m not sure if that was more or less acceptable to her.
Or just change your standards. Try to find someone you share something in common with, don't just go for looks. I don't know if that's helpful or actionable though.
I got that in HS, too. Took till like college until I started caring about dating. But that was in like 2000 so it was a lot less accepted so it was appreciated.
My parents always used language that didn't presume we were heterosexual. Eventually, she started using even more inclusive language specifically for me, which was kinda weird but cool. I think she's finally just realized I'm not interested in romance or sex. Idk. I don't like bringing up topics like that, and I think she wants to give me space to bring that kind of thing up when I'm ready, so we just play a guessing game?
I remember my mom once worriedly asked me if I was gay because "I never saw you with a girlfriend". I was a rude, long-haired, weird looking rocker asshole, and 15 at the time of the question.
My parents had this conversation with me once I hit college. I was thankful that they were open minded and supportive but it was awkward convincing them that while I very much liked the opposite gender I had other priorities at that time.
Disagree. Mom may be awkward or slightly ignorant, but telling your child that you accept them if they’re gay and presumably worried about mentioning their dating life to you is basically the opposite of toxic.