The market is unpredictable

Only two people in this demographic:
- A 71 Hemi Cuda is my dream car, but there is no way I'd have that kitchen
  
  You have to be plumb crazy to own a real cuda, and that kitchen is a plumb crazy qualifier. Come back when you're ready to fully commit to the complete cuda club experience. Maybe one day...

LOL fuck flippers. Making living expensive for everyone else.
- No one did this for a flip. This reads as someone who really likes purple. That floor and countertop cost extra and someone flipping wouldn't have spent the money on that. A flip would be boring brown or gray with the cheapest materials and crappy workmanship.
  
  Yup, safe colors and cheap materials is key to flipping.
- Also their 'renovations' usually just need to be taken out or repaired to normal by the buyer as they rarely use proper licensed tradesmen, or check to see if what they're doing is even sound for the building. I've seen a center brick fireplace, clearly holding up the roof, just ripped out and plastered over.
  
  This made my European building standard brain spasm… how could one… that’s outright negligence…

My question isn't their taste, but their budget. How the hell did that kitchen cost $15,000? Even if they had to replace everything I couldn't see it being more than $5k.
Is the floor also marble?
- 15k is a very normal price to flip an entire kitchen. Not even counting the appliances. Just the flooring and cabinets.
  
  Yeah it seems like I can't get anything done for < 6000 anymore. I can't imagine a whole kitchen costing only 15
- Lol when was the last time you priced out a kitchen remodel? 5k would maybe get you the cabinets
  
  It was admittedly a while ago, but pre-built cabinets are like $200 a piece so there's maybe $1500 worth of cabinets there. It's not a huge kitchen.
  Unless these idiots bought custom made cabinets, didn't bother doing anything to the left of the stove, and then painted them a horrible color.
- 2-3k to paint existing cabinets, new hardware 4-5k epoxy floor and countertops 4-5k new appliances 3-4k left for drywall, paint, lighting, trim, framing, hvac, plumbing, electrical.
  She could have gotten more for less but not by much when you are hiring it all out. Doesn't even look like she touched the tile backsplash, which would be 1-2k more.
  I remodel kitchens in the midwest, and we would charge a lot more than that for this size kitchen. She clearly didn't spend for a designer, though.
  
  Damn, I should get into home improvement. I always did all that myself which is why my estimate was so low.
  Plus that doesn't look like a terribly expensive stove or sink.
  
  2-3K for paint?
  You’re getting reamed by your painter if he’s charging you 2-3k for a small room like that.
- You are living in the past.
  
  No, I just do a lot of stuff myself. I could do better than that kitchen for $5,000 with some smart shopping and elbow grease. I redid the floors, bathroom, and kitchen in an 1860s cabin for that much back in 2013
- How the hell did that kitchen cost $15,000?
  The floor is also marble. And purple marble.
  
  To be fair it also looks like a photoshop job.
- Lol an IKEA kitchen now a bit bigger than that is 10k€ without placement and composite counters and no floor. Prices have over doubled in the past 5 years. + floor and actual stone countertop is easily 15k
  We are renovating our entire house and doing everything except pouring concrete slabs and our tile roof ourselves and the kitchen this big + and island is 15k€ at good value places, slightly better places are 25k+ with placement.
  5k is an absolute pipe dream. Wholesale materials alone without appliances would be around 9k (assuming decent quality cupboards and real stone)
  
  That assumes you're starting with new as opposed to reclaimed materials. I saved a bundle by taking someone else's old kitchen cabinets and reusing them.
  But, as I said in another comment, I am an old person who used to buy gas for less than 25¢ per liter and do everything myself so my prices are skewed.

Man, I love me some purple/violet, but this just ain't it
Although I don't hate the floor. With something complimentary going on it would actually look good imo
- That floor would pair well with an uncontrolled structure fire.
  
  That's probably fair. I'm not an interior designer.
- I LOVE the floor tbh but yeah maybe just like purple highlights on the cabinets instead of the entire thing. It's giving me circa 2005 decorating my sims 2 home.

15k on what exactly? They just painted the wooden doors of the old units purple.
- On the drugs that convinced them to do this.
- Seems legit to me. Pretty much any kitchen reno is hard to keep under $10k. It adds up soo fast
  
  I'm in the middle of building new cabinets for my kitchen and I was freaking out over what the wood I'm using costs (about $25 for each 8'x1' plank) until I priced even the shittiest prebuilt cabinets at Lowe's. Holy fuck those things are expensive, and they're just shitty pressboard.
  
  Assuming you get a contractor to do it for you, and most self-respecting contractors should refuse to do this job.
- I see no before picture so I assume the marble flooring and countertops. Plus the mosaic backsplash tiling maybe? And it's entirely possible those are brand new cupboards.
  
  Not sure of that is real marble, but here's a random PSA anyway:
  Don't put marble anywhere close to anywhere you might spill anything remotely resembling acid. You can literally etch that stuff with OJ.

I don't think Saints Row fans would go that far
- But the Los Carnales would!

Personally I like it, but I am well aware that I have tacky taste.

Except for the purple, it is a nice kitchen.
Purple is just the color we see least in nature. That is why it is associated with unfamiliar things like aliens, magic, lovecraftian gods, ...
So having it in your house makes you have less of an attraction with it.
Here is the same picture, but just with a different hue:
- I’m now convinced they just hue shifted the image for memes.
  
  The black on the marble looks very purple so I'd hazard to say there's a high chance of that
- I like the purple more tbth...
- They installed full height cabinets under a chase... There's not enough room under them now.
- Now the floor is covered in ... brown skids 🫠
  
  The market: 💩
- Those cabinets in brown are hideous. I'm not a fan of the purple, either, but at least it has character.

Who's gonna buy it? Prince?
- you might need a time machine for that
- Who? The former artist formerly known as?
  The cabinets aren't so bad, paint isn't difficult. But the floors and countertops. Oof.
  
  See I'm the opposite. The cabinets are an absolute eyesore, but the floor looks awesome. I would love to have a floor like that
- Him or a Vikings fan.

Apart from the eyecancer-inducing color scheme - I cannot see any dishwasher.
- Well then it's definitely a deal breaker 😂
  (Are dishwashers that common in the states? I've lived in 16 houses and never had one, when friends get them installed it's a celebration, they're dishwasher owning kind of people now, fancy)
  
  I've never been to a house in Norway that didn't have a dishwasher. Even cabins up in the mountain or old seaside cabins have them installed if they got water access. Where do you live where it isn't common?
  
  I've had one apartment w/o a dishwasher, and that was a 100+ yo house that had been converted into apartments, and the kitchen was super small.
  Other than that, every apartment and house has had a dishwasher. Mine actually has two (second is in a basement kitchenette w/ no stove or oven).
  
  They are common not only in the US. I would not want to miss it - it would seriously degrade my joy in cooking if I had to spend as long on cleaning as on cooking.
  
  Very common. Almost every home built in the past 50 years would have one. Not sure about apartments.
  
  They're only useful for parties imo. Otherwise you put your spatula (or whatever) in the dishwasher and have to wait all week for the dishwasher to fill up with all the other dirty dishes just so you can have your clean spatula back. But yes in the US they are in every kitchen.
- POV: The Dishwasher

I know several people who would pick this house just for the kitchen..
- Is it wrong that I kinda fuck with it?
  
  If you’re wrong I don’t want to be right
- I’m absolutely one of them. It’s a bit wacky, but not non functionally so. My taste leans simple but bold
- How did you get introduced to the cast of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City?
  
  I guess I fucked one for 7 years? But she never told me she was a reality TV star!

This is PhotoShopped, but...
If it were real, the problem isn't the purple. It's the white.
- Oh shit, I forgot I had flux turned on, so I was like "that's an old fashioned brown, but not too garish". There's a lot of blue in that brown...
- I would like my house in dark mode please
- Partly. White for the countertops is fine, white on that floor... isn't.
  But the purple is definitely an issue as well, go with browns or pretty much anywhere on the black/white spectrum for cabinets. IF you go with anything else, you really need to be careful with the rest of the kitchen design.
  
  My thought was a teal, light green, light blue or other light and airy color to maintain the whimsy but be less jarring
  
  Also, there's no reason to add a white backsplash on a white wall.

NGL the epoxy floor and countertops look sick.
\ But it's just way too much purple for a kitchen, or any room really
- I like the countertops... in the picture. The floor looks like I'm back in a mcdonalds in the 90s.
  
  Yeah imo that floor is more of a deal breaker than the overabundance of purple, but then again I am a purple enjoyer (although I prefer my purple to have more blue in it)
  
  Man you had some fancy McDonalds!
  \ But I do agree there is something about this that makes it look like a toy kitchen set.

Corporations are purchasing unprecedented amounts of real estate, but it's definitely the market that's keeping this from selling.

So I've spent the last month looking for Houses. Nothing special, nothing extravagant. I came from a 1700sqft ranch with 3 bed, 2 full bath and a car port, small town, sold for about 215, and I got 135 take home after everything was paid off.
I had to expand my budget to 350 up here just to sniff houses that aren't in absolute disrepair on the inside and would require 50+ in reno, are 1.5 bth, or someone watched a couple episodes of Flippers and did a shittier job of "updating" the inside by putting the same cheap shitty grey vinyl flooring in several rooms.
There was 1 house I really liked, good area, open floor plan and a great basement. Downside was all the first floor carpet needed to be tore up especially since there were large stains in one of the bedrooms and it was poorly installed so was already buckled and loose, and there were cheap vinyl tiles in the foyer and kitchen that showed their wear and had to be removed. Just under 1700sq ft listed at 340 and went over asking the day it hit the market.
Another house, looked move in ready. 1500sq ft, with a half finished basement. Went to look at it...the house is claustrophobic, and the carpet needs to be pulled up also because of the terrible condition. The owners "finished" the basement by putting large vinyl tiles down themselves...which have already buckled and are about an inch off the ground in several places. They have a back patio which is about big enough for a Weber kettle grill and a camp chair. They're asking 336, claimed they already had an offer when I was looking at it but I noped outta that shit. That was a week ago and it's still on the market so either they were using BS tactics or the "offer" was for what the house was actually worth and they refused it. It's also the smallest house in a large neighborhood.
- the same cheap shitty grey vinyl flooring
  I have never in my life hated a house product more than this shit - and I grew up in the '70s surrounded by the fake wood paneling and the nasty shag carpets. I don't even understand what that flooring is trying to emulate. No real wood is light gray and comes in 6" x 3' planks.
  I've been renovating a house since last year that has that shit in the living room and I've intentionally left it uncovered the whole time in the hopes of fucking it up so bad that I'm forced to replace it, but unfortunately it is extremely durable.
  
  This one particularly hurt. The house was listed at 350 a couple months ago, the price was reduced 10k, then went off the market, then yesterday was relisted at like 330 and claims "brand new flooring in 3 rooms". Someone consciously chose this to be installed, thinking it would help sell their already overpriced house.
  Like, the salesperson needs to say "this flooring is popular among houses that stay listed for over 3 months and have their prices reduced around 25k"
- Why did your house sell for 215?
  
  Because that's what houses in that area were going for on the high end. Cost of living where I am now is redonk

People shit on "acceptable beige", "agreeable gray" (aka "millennial gray"), etc. but the problem is most things that people like more are more divisive. The people that live this kitchen I'm sure LOVE this kitchen. But for everyone else it's a pass.
- Speaking as one of the "everyone else", it's not just a pass on the kitchen, but a deal-breaker for the entire house. I look at this and all I see is so many of my weekends being wasted getting it to a state that my wife and I would even consider acceptable.
  
  Exactly. And the fact that they sunk so much into the renovation is upsetting. When I sold my house my wife and I briefly considered fixing some stuff up but it's like... I'm gonna pay some big amount of money then charge more but if I don't I can sell for less and sell quicker. Then again it's not like the house was a mess. Plus this was during the craze of 2021 so getting offers wasn't a concern.

I stand by that I fucking love that kitchen. Add a ton of modernist architecture that makes you think and a yard I’m allowed to grow food and replace the grass with mint and I’m in.
- FYI, modernist architecture is mostly stuff from the 60's.
  
  Oh I know, that was the era of some architects having fun with it and trying bold things as opposed to the modern style of conformist mini mansions

When did Pimp my Ride start doing houses?
- 410 days ago, + or - 6 days
  
  lol, actually laughing. Thanks for that!
- I'm getting a Costco meets Paisley Park vibe.

Ngl, i love unconventional house designs like this. it hurts to look at.
And thats exactly why I like it. I want people to enter my house and immediately get overstimulated with a headache. Every room is either a color theme or a specific style.
"and over here we have the kawaii gamer themed room, and here we have the Punk Anarchy themed room, And to the right you will find the Lisa Frank themed bedroom..."
- The masque of the red death over here...
  
  https://tenor.com/view/omg-hai-gif-3851482155396962172
  how do i embed this right...
- You'd just have a reputation of being such a freak tbh ...
  
  BUHHUHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA
  GOOD.

yeah this goes hard, can't lie

It's grape flavored.
- I'm gonna tie you to the radiator Ggggrrraaape you!
  For reference: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tmrDypTB_Y0

Nevermind the purple, although it's ugly as hell, but having that dead space in the corner doesn't leave much room for prep work, since both ends are also basically useless for anything you actually do in the kitchen except perhaps as temporary storage. This leaves you with exactly one place to actually prep on, and it's not exactly a large one either.
We also know full well that the corner would be full of appliances as well, which leaves us with even less room.
Shitty kitchen all around, imo.
- But the cabinets are too low to fit appliances under them.

P1mp1n ain't easy player.

suddenly craving ube

no its the market who is wrong

I think we all know the problem here. Need a custom purple range and different hardware on the cabinets, would've sold in 3 days easy
- You never go full purple...

I’m going to be honest, I like it

I don't know if I would actually want it but it's definitely pretty.

Being that purple is my favourite colour, I'm this one's target demographic. Unfortunately I'm too poor to be purchasing real estate 🤷

Barftastic!

that was very definitely predictable

I think we've had this one before.

NGL I would love that kitchen.
But what does the rest of the house look like.

The top left, weird blank space where a cabinet should be bothers me the most. Overall this has a weird rental property vibe with the reused, painted cabinets.
- Space to mount a microwave?
  
  I'd probably make the cabinets above the stove smaller so a microwave with a vent hood could be mounted above the stove. Maybe try to get a small purple cabinet over on the left too.

The color matches a favorite fanny pack I had worn forever in my youth. But I would not buy this house because of the cooking range hood is a recirculating type -- no true vent to the outside.

am i high or are those cabinets just like really short? or does this kitchen have like 10ft high ceilings.
- It's a weird perspective. Probably due to taking the picture on a small stepstool with a wide angle lens. That gives you the 'height' and then cropping the sides would not give your brain the context clues.
  
  that might be it honestly
- I think you're high, it looks fine to me. There's only like a foot and a half between the countertops and the counter. It looks to me like the counter is pretty shallow because the kitchen is tiny.
  
  that might be the case, something about it is off and messing with my brain. I would still be willing to bet those are high ceilings though.

In the Australian housing market, that would go for $1.5mil easy.

Permanently Deleted

Those are some tall top cabinets, you allmost have no space below them to work

Swap the metal surfaces out for bronze / gold-color-aluminium-plating maybe

Nice kitchen. Mine is orange.

Those appliances are ancient. Consider upgrading.

Flippin' hell!

I know at least 3 people who would love this kitchen.
- Grimace
  Dipsy
  Barney
- I like it.
  I would become an ice cream artisan.
  Open door studio, come on in and see me frolic on my cold floor mixing mad flavour combos.

Diamond Now. For when you need class … today.

It's days like this I curse the world for letting me be born with eyes.